The Vixen
by Madison4208
Summary: Edward CEO of EC Enterprises, a real ladies man, finds himself needing a new assistant. The one he hires in nothing he expected. Will he finally find true love or just go back to his delivish womanizing ways? Lemony sweet All human
1. If you lived here you'd be home now

**Author's notes- I do not own these Twilight characters**

**Please review and enjoy!**

It's Christmas Eve, I'm having my company's Christmas party at my condo and who knew in just minutes I would be sitting here watching my whole life fall apart. Bella, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. It is over something so stupid. She had finally agreed to move in with me. I had asked her numerous times, but she always said she wasn't ready. Neither of us were big fans of commitment, but as soon as I saw her I knew I loved her. The more I loved her, the more I knew I wanted her and only her. Forever. She finally agreed to move in a few

days ago, that's what I wanted for Christmas. Nothing else, just for her to wake up in my arms every morning. She hasn't even brought anything over yet and we were already fighting over furniture. Now I'm sitting here in a drunken stupor, sitting in my chair staring at the place we rarely shared. She hadn't shown up to the party yet, well if she was even going to. I just wanted to have a good Christmas with my love, but it looks like that's not going to happen. Yes, once again Edward Cullen would be alone on Christmas.

My employees are gathered out on the balcony, drinking and being merry. I'm sitting here just feeling sorry for myself. I have a bottle of Glenlivet and a rocks glass to keep me company. That's all I wanted right now, well besides her. The music is going in one ear and right out the other. I couldn't even tell you what song was playing. Several people tried to get me to joy the fun, but I just wanted my Bella. I checked my phone every ten minutes, hoping she would call, text, anything. Still nothing. I hope she was at her home , safe and sound. Even though more than anything I wanted her here. I would give anything, just for her to be here in my arms.

"Hello Edward", Tanya my ex said hugging me from behind.

"Go away, just leave me alone", I told her

"Come out here, everyone wants to see you."

"I'm fine right here".

"Edward, this is your party, come dance with me", Tanya pleaded

"No", I shouted

"Eddie don't do me that way", she said pulling me in for a kiss while holding mistletoe over my head.

When I finally get her off of me, I look up to see Bella with a thin rectangular box wrapped in silver paper with a bright red bow. She looked so beautiful in a red silk dress. Tears start pouring over, running her makeup down her face and the present hits the floor. Glass shattered and she ran out the door. I was way too drunk to run after her. I couldn't even get out of the chair, much less go after her. I kept yelling for her, but I knew she would be gone. I called her phone non-stop, leaving message after message to explain myself. Then she finally blocked my number. I gave up and passed out.

The next morning I woke up in the chair, with a headache from hell. My place is trashed. Food, liquor bottles, beer bottles everywhere. Appreciative employees huh? I was a horrible excuse for a human being. I drank almost a whole bottle of bourbon, while I sat around feeling sorry for myself. I don't even remember most of the night. Glad my employees at least decided to leave at point. Then I look down and saw a present on the floor. Oh shit, it was coming back to me..... Bella saw Tanya kissing me. I tried calling Bella again. Shit, she still had my number blocked. I walked over and sat on the floor. I read the card first.

_To Edward the love of my life. _

_Here's to our first Christmas together and to many many more._

_I love you more than life its self _

_-- Bella_

I unwrapped the present, it was a picture frame with a ...........


	2. Eight months earlier

Eight months earlier

I'm sitting at my desk, pondering over me actually getting up to get my own coffee. Selfish? Yes, maybe, but it's what I have become accustomed to. I haven't made my own coffee in years, unless I am at home. But then, I am Edward Cullen. CEO of EC Enterprises. I built this company with my own bare hands, why should I get my own coffee? Okay, forget the coffee, let's move on to the fifty or more e-mails I have staring at me, waiting for me open them. I need a new assistant. Jessica my assistant of three years unexpectedly quit Friday.

She's six months pregnant and wants to take time off till the baby is born. I can't even imagine having a child, I can't even have a relationship for more than a month, much less take care of something for eighteen years or more. No one excites me anymore, I get bored. I have women throwing themselves at me all day long. I want, no need a challenge, someone to captivate my attention and well pleasure me. Someone that is more than just a , well a fuck to put it bluntly. Anyhow, I need to look through these e-mails to find an assistant.

I find no reason to interview anyone, I will not know if they are a fit, till I actually see them work, plus I have no time for the lenghty interviewing process. I needed someone now. I had the receptionist e-mail me resumes of the top five most qualified candidates with extensive background checks complete.

Let's see the first one, Elizabeth Lemon, was an assistant for a year. Delete, not enough experience. Next is Brodie Jenkins, a guy, delete. Next one, Isabella Swan, assistant for Victoria Smed over at Mode Magazine. I know Victoria very well, we saw each other off and on for several years. I guess you could call her a "booty" call. She is wicked and doesn't take shit. I think Isabella will already be whipped into shape. Yes, she will do.

It's the following Monday, I hear a knock at my door.

"Come in," I yelled, still typing on my computer.

"Hello, Mr. Cullen, I'm Isabella Swan", she said in the most beautiful voice, sounded like an angel calling to me.

I look up to see a tall brunette with the longest legs I have ever seen.

"Hello Isabella, please take a seat."

She sat down and I couldn't help but stare at her for what seemed like hours. She was beautiful. Long brown hair down to the middle of her back, chocolate brown eyes, that invited you in and full lips. She was wearing a black wrap dress with leopard stilettos. She would fit in just fine. Coming from a fashion magazine, she knew how to dress, and I like my assistants to look as good as me, since I take them to dinners and meetings with me.

"Isabella, here is the list of my expectations, your work cell phone, and keys. My old assistant left everything you need to know at your desk. Your are to schedule all my appointments, and anything else I need. This will not be a problem will it?"

"No sir", she said while recrossing her legs

I caught a glimpse of her pink panties. I just went from six to midnight.

She seems very confident, I like this.

Isabella got settled in. She had the office right across the hall. Jessica left detailed instruction on what to do, when, where, everything. I liked to have everything planned out. I'm a busy man, but still need time to go to the gym, dinners, and what not, especially the what not. The rest of the day was useless. I could only imagine Isabella wrapping those long luscious legs around me. I have slept with my assistants before, but it always ended badly. They always wanted more and became needy and attached. They couldn't take looking at me all day, so they would quit. Usually making a big scene. I'm done with all of that or so I thought.

"Mr. Cullen, Victoria is on line one", Isabella said over the intercom, interupting my day dreaming. I was waiting for this call, so I picked up the phone.

"Well, Hello Victoria, surprised to here from you", I laughed

"Edward, how could you?" she sneered at me

"What?"

"Stealing my assistant, I trained her, do you know how long it takes to find one worth keeping? Huh? Edward do you? Do you think you can just dazzle people and not suffer any consequences??" She screamed in the phone

"Victoria, Victoria, settled down, you will find a new one, Isabella needed to move on to bigger and better things". I told her almost mocking her

"Well if you saying what I think you are, she will be begging me in a month for her job back".

*****dial tone******

She was right though, if I tried to get into Isabella's pants, she would be gone in a month. That's just how it works with me. I don't like to be tied down. My sister is always telling me not to hire the "pretty girls" and maybe I would keep an assistant. The only reason I had Jessica so long was that she was already married and I usually don't go down that path. It almost always ends badly, for me.


	3. Dinner Meeting

Isabella has been with me for two weeks now. She is a great assistant. She always has my morning coffee right when I get in, she schedules everything perfectly, so I'm never rushing. She only has me take important phone calls. She was ... well perfect! She would even come in my office to file paper work and sometimes just sit and talk. She would lean over and I would catch myself taking peeks at her cleavage or staring at her ass when she bent over. I tried to control myself though. I needed to keep her. Sometimes though, it seems like she was doing it on purpose, like she knew I was watching her. Unfortunately all this built up sexual tension has caused me to call upon many booty calls. I find myself imagining it's Isabella. I know I'm sounding so pathetic. I have never wanted something so much and yet I couldn't have it. Or could I?

"Isabella come to my office please."

"Yes, Mr. Cullen", she said

"I need you at my business dinner tonight", I told her

"No problem" she said sitting down in "her" chair

I really didn't, it was just dinner with regular clients that happen to be in town, I just wanted an excuse for her to come.

"I will pick you up in my limo at 6:45 sharp"

"Yes sir." She said bending over to fix her shoe.

Really? I thought to myself. Does she always have to look so damn good. I caught a glimpse of her right breast. How much I wanted to jump over my desk and rip that little black vest right off of her.

"I assume you have something appropriate to wear", I said trying to get my thoughts else where.

"Yes, Mr. Cullen"

I knew she did, having worked for Victoria. She didn't allow people to dress out of season or style. I'm sure Isabella has an extensive wardrobe.

6:45 on the dot, I was at Isabella's apartment complex. Victoria must have been paying her well, I guess she didn't get much of a raise coming to work for me. Here it is 34C. I rang the bell. She opened the door immediately, I think my heart skipped a beat. She was astonishingly beautiful. She was wearing a knee length midnight blue dress. Her hair was in a messy bun, and her eyes were smokey.

"Hello, Mr. Cullen" she said in a soultry voice, then turned around and yelled Jeff leave out the back.

What? Jeff? Who the hell is Jeff I thought to myself.

"Sorry about that", she spatted, "I had other plans that were hard to get out of."

I could feel my eyes growing darker, I'm usually not the jealous type, but really? I knew she went out with guys all the time. Guys would show up all the time to take her to lunch or dinner. I tried to ignore it, but I wish it was me. Flowers would arrive what seemed like every other day. She was almost like a girl version of me. A different guy every night. *sigh*

We entered the restaurant, it was hostess sat us at my reserved table. I always sat at the same table. We were the first there, that's how I liked it. I told her to sit by me. I ordered us drinks. A bourbon on the rocks for me and a dirty vodka martini for her. Before our drinks even got here my guests had arrived.

"Mr. Johnson, Levi, Bradley please take a seat". "This is my assistant Isabella."

"Very nice to meet you Isabella", Mr. Johnson said while grabbing her hand and kissing it.

"Nice to meet you to, please call me Bella though", she said in her angelic voice.

Dinner went on, everyone laughing and talking. Bella suprised me, most assistants would just sit there and say nothing, but she was involved in the whole conversation. They loved her, she was just perfect. I found myself at times just staring at her as she talked. She's going to be very useful for meetings more important than this. Mr. Johnson and his crew left shortly after 9:30. Isabella and I stayed around a bit after. Neither of us were ready to go home and I was really enjoying her company. She wasn't like most girls who just sit there and talk about themselves all night, so you either want to kick them out of your bed or just fuck their brains out, so they will shut up. We talked about everything, college, her working for Victoria. We had so much in common. We both love basketball and watching scarey movies. We even decided out of work that she was Bella and I was Edward. None of that formal stuff out of work. She was getting me wild up though, she would put her hand on my thigh every once in awhile. She was very touchy feely, but that could just be the grey goose.

"Edward its getting really late and well I'm very drunk", she spouted out

"Let me take you home Bella"

I grabbed her purse and wrapped my arm around her waist.

We got back to her apartment, I walked her to her door.

"Bella you were amazing tonight, thank you," I told her as I kissed her hand

"Thank you Edward, I really enjoyed it", she said still slurring a little

She turned around too fast and hit her head on the door making her fall back, I caught her. She turned around getting her footing again to look at me. We were staring into each others eyes. Neither one of us breaking eye contact.

"Good night Edward", she said giving me a peck on the cheek, see you tomorrow


	4. My mind war

I decided to go to work late today. I needed a morning jog to get my head straight again. Bella was cluttering my brain up, I need to get focused again. I kept going over and over the details in my head from last night. How I wish I would have kissed her. I could have done something to let her know I have feelings for her. Did I miss my opportunity? Now I'm afraid this is how the book ends, nothing but good friends. So ya, needless to say the jog didn't help me at all. I went to lunch with my sister Alice. She was just ecstatic to hear I liked someone. Alice could see through me though, she told me that this is the real thing, don't let it go. Those words keep echoing through the ears, don't let it go. So it's decided I have to make a move, but how?

When I arrived at work a little after twelve she was at her desk, typing away. She walked in my office right behind me. I could feel her eyes on my back.

"Good afternoon Mr. Cullen", she said, can I get you some lunch before your two o'clock meeting? While running her finger down my desk.

"No thank you Isabella", I already ate, I told her

My heart sank a little. She didn't act any different since yesterday, maybe she didn't feel the spark between us. I didn't even remember having a meeting scheduled today. I sat down at my desk, looked at my calendar that Bella had laid out for me. Luckily there wasn't a lot going on this week, maybe I should take some time off. Not seeing her would make this teenage crush disappear. My meeting today said Mr. Browning. I wondered what he wanted, another business proposition. He was always trying to get me give him money for his "projects", they always failed though. I did enjoy his company , he was a nice old man and he told the best stories. He was a ladies man as well. It was nice to hear those stories, but I will never forget the last time when he told me one day it all ends, to find someone special and never let them go. He let "the one" go and says there is never a day that he doesn't regret it.

It was almost two, so I decided to go ahead and make my way down to the conference room. Bella gave me a sexy wink as I walked by. I just nodded my head, instead of doing what my man tool had in mind. Must she torment me everyday? Enough with the peek at her panties and breast everyday. It's driving me insane. Even at dinner last night how she would stir her martini with her finger, then suck on it. I can't take it anymore.

Edward Cullen, focus, how is one women making you so insane.

I walked into the empty conference room, I see two drinks, one empty, the other full and a ticket. Was I late? She said two. I saw a note under the empty glass.

_Thanks for the bourbon Edward, I had emergency to attend to. Here is a ticket to tonight's Knick's game._

_Charles Browning_

He bought luxury box seats for this season, but one ticket? I guess it couldn't hurt to go by myself. I swigged the other glass of bourbon and left.


	5. Knicks Game

I finally arrive at the Knicks game, traffic was a nightmare of course. I didn't even go home to change out of my suit to try and miss the worst of the bumper to bumper traffic. Lo and behold she is sitting there drinking a martini with her legs kicked up on the chair in front of her. Wearing a Knicks jersey, a white pleaded skirt and red stilettos. Her hair up in a pony tail with lots of curls. She turns her head a gives me a wicked smile, I think my jaw dropped to the floor. She never ceases to amaze me.

"Bella what are you doing here?" I asked her

"Mr. Browning gave me a ticket, you know I wouldn't pass up a basketball game," she said twirling her finger in her martini

"Can I get you a drink Mr. Cullen"? She said in a sexy voice while sucking the vodka off of her finger.

I don't know why, but I loved it when she called me Mr. Cullen.

"Bourbon on the rocks would be great", I told her.

She walked over to the bar and bent over to get a glass out. I looked over hoping to get a peek, and boy did I. She wasn't wearing any panties. I could see her hot sex staring me in the face. She looked back at me to make sure I was watching her. Then walked over and handed me my drink. I swigged the whole glass back. I could feel my heart starting to beat faster. I walked over to get me another one. I needed one and fast. She knew I saw her, and obviously wanted me too. Bella you little vixen you. She knew what she was doing to me, everyday, she knew. I know that now for sure. I tried to control myself, luckily I was still wearing my jacket to cover up the huge erection I had in my pants. I would defiantly being sending Mr. Browning a wonderful thank you for this. I went and sat next to her after refilling my glass and not the normal shot or two, I filled it to the rim.

"Did I miss much", I asked her, not knowing what to say

"Nothing yet", she said sucking an olive her the sword from her drink

Yet? What is that suppose to mean. I took another gulp of my drink and took my jacket off. It was getting way too hot in here. I kept running my hands through my hair, I don't know why but I was so anxious and nervous right now. I'm usually so confident and in control. How is this happening to me? It's like I was numb. In any other situation the ravish beast in me would be fucking the shit out of this girl.

"I need another martini", she said twirling her empty glass in my face.

She walked in front of me showing off her tight little ass again. I wanted so bad to slap it as she walked by, but I just sat there. I took off my tie and unbuttoned the top two buttons of my shirt. She walked back to the window standing in front of my view. She had put the ball in my court now, I'm was going to have to make a move or drop the ball. I walked over and stood right behind her so she could feel my throbbing erection, I wanted her to feel what she was doing to me. I ran my hands from her shoulders down to her hands, intertwining her fingers with mine. I nibbled on her ear and whispered Miss Swan your a better door than a window. She slowly turned around facing me, sitting on the window seal. We stared into each other's eyes. Fuck Cullen, make your move I shouted in my head.

I leaned in towards her giving her a soft sweet kiss on her luscious lips. I instantly felt sparks running through my entire body, which only made me want more. Then I framed her face with my hands and kissed her again, longer this time. I loved her taste, so sweet. I ran my fingers through her hair, pulling her in tighter. She wrapped those long legs around me, just they way I had wanted her too since the first day we met. She moaned as our tongues swept over each others, deepening the kiss. My hands moved from her hair, to explore all over her body. She started unbuttoning the rest of my shirt, running her hands all over my bare chest. She took off her jersey and I started at the perfection before me. She was wearing a red lace bra, she was undeniably sexy. I slipped the straps off her shoulders and undid the hooks, just letting it fall to the floor. I took her right breast in my mouth and gave it a long hard suck. Bella started undoing my belt, the unzipped my pants. I was just standing in my black boxers.

"Mr. Cullen, have you ever had sex at a Knicks game"? she whispered in my ear.

I didn't even bother answering her, she had answered my question. I took her right then and there at the Knicks game during the third quarter.


	6. Where do we go from here?

**Author's note - I do not own Twilight characters, just there adventures**

**please send some love/ thoughts/ reviews**

**thanks**

It has been so long, well maybe even the first time I have been totally satisfied with sex. Bella and I's bodies just melded so perfectly together, like we were meant to be together.

I don't understand all these feelings I have now , I have never had them before. I have never been with a women that could match me word for word, touch to touch, kiss to sweet kiss.

Bella was different and I knew that from the first time I laid eyes on her. I had always been the dominate one, having to take control, make the first move. Now I can only sit here in my bed remembering the sex I had with her just four hours ago. Not just sex, put hot, at the Knick's game sex. The thoughts of my dick moving in and out of her has raided my mind since I got home. Bella is beautiful, body, mind and soul, her body God's masterpiece.

Now I'm just left with the memory, and a throbbing hard dick from constantly rethinking about it. I know my dreams with be filled with her sweet memory from the game. Now where do we go from here?

After the game I invited her over to my place, she politelty declined. She gave no explanation, but could I expect one? She didn't owe me one. I hadn't invited her to the game, she was just there. How do I act? We aren't together cause of one night. Was she sent to me, to give me a dose of my own medicine? No women has ever declined an invitation back to my place. I didn't even know how to react. I'm even starting to feel bad for the numerous, okay that's probably an understatement, tons of women I had done that to before. That's just how I worked, fuck em' and go home.

******ringing********

Fuck. I have been sitting here off in my own little world, I didn't realize it was morning till my alarm went off.

I arrived at the office early, I wanted to be her before she got here, so I had time to mentally prepare myself for whatever was to come. A short, fat man walks up behind me carrying an arrangement of roses.

"Sir, is Bella Swan in"? He asked stuttering a bit

"No sir, can I help you with something"?, I asked with venom in my voice

"I have a delivery for Ms. Swan", he told me, as if I couldn't figure that out on my own. Jealousy started creeping up on me.

"I will sign", I scolded while grabbing the clip board. I didn't even sign my name.

_Brian Thompson_

It was my college roommates name. Pathetic I know, but this was I would never be traced back to it, having to explain myself. I knew no one would be here for at least half an hour. I desperatley wanted to read the card.

_Can't wait to see you again_

_Sincerely,_

_Jacob Black_

I don't know what foreign emotions casted over me, but before I knew it I had crumbled up the note and had made my way down the the trash can to throw the roses away. I don't know what the hell was going on with me, but some other guy wasn't going to move in on Bella. Who sends red roses anyway? They are so cliche. Before I could rethink what I had just done, that beautiful little vixen comes waltzing through the elevator doors.

She gave me that sexy wink and continued down to her office. I just stood there like an idiot, it was like she cut my throat, I couldn't speak. She was early this morning, just me and her in the building minus the few security guards and what not. My heart immediately started beating faster. I just stood there in shock not knowing what to do. I thought I was going to have to remind myself to breathe. Do I go about my day as usual? Hoping to get a glimpse of her or daydreaming about being with her again. No, that would just lead to an uncomfortable bulge in my pants again. Wait, too late, it was already there.

We were both sitting in our offices. I couldn't help but wonder what she was doing, she was never this early. To get my mind off of her, I started checking my e-mails. Guilt started boiling over me, what was wrong with me? This is not me. I have never acted this way. I was always cool and collect, now I'm falling apart like a high school girl. This can't be healthy for me. I need to end this now. My every thought was clouded with her. As much as my body wanted it, my mind was telling me no. As much as I wanted my body to win, I knew in the long run it would be better this way. I don't see this ending any way but badly. As I was struggling yet with another mind war, Bella comes pouncing in my office carrying two cups of Starbucks coffee.

"Mr. Cullen", she said while handing me one

"Thank you Bella," I told her, giving her a crooked smile

Damn she looked beautiful today

She sat in her chair as we were just the same as always, like I had never fucked her brains out the night before. This is all so new to me, I was waiting for her to say something, something to let me know she was just like every other women. Ask me where this relationship was going. But no, of course she wouldn't

"So ... Mr. Cullen, I have two tickets to see the Red Hot Chili Peppers and my date cancelled last minute, you interested?"

"For tonight? Umm sure I don't have plans". I stuttered a little

"Fabulous, pick me up at 6:30?" She asked

"Sounds good", I told her


	7. I like pleasure spiked with pain

**Author's notes - do not own Twilight characters**

**Please review --- thanks**

I picked Bella up at her apartment, she was stunning as usual. She wore a black tank top, a plaid skirt and flip flops. I went casual with a grey t-shirt and jeans. She pecked my cheek and grabbed my hand, almost running us to my car. I knew she loved music, it was her life and The Chili Peppers were one of her favorite bands. I loved seeing how excited she was, this was a side of her I had never seen. Giddy, like a little school girl. The whole way to the stadium she was bouncing around and running circles around me. The more I got to know about her, the more I was falling in love with her. Yes, I said it, I'm falling in love with this girl. There is nothing I can do about it, but hope she is doing the same. I could no longer fight the feeling, I needed to just let it happen. The way she looked at me, the little ways she would touch me some how, it drove me wild. I was falling fast, like an avalanche.

We arrived at the concert a bit late, everyone in there seats. Blink 182 had opened for them. Loud music filled the air, along with screams. Bella's eyes were opened so wide, like a kid on Christmas morning. We grabbed a couple of beers and headed to our seats.

"Front row baby!" She said, still dragging me along

We made our way to our seats. The Chili Peppers were coming on stage. Everyone was screaming around us. Bella starts jumping up and down excited to see Anthony Kiedis. I stopped looking at the stage to watch her perfect, beautiful breast bounce up and down. I felt my cock twitch.

A few songs later they played "Hard to Concentrate", the words were flowing through the ears. I had never really listened to the words before, but tonight they really hit me, I understood the meaning.

_Do you want me to show up for duty?_

_And serve this women and honor her beauty?_

_And finally you have found something perfect_

_And finally you have found yourself with me_

I pulled her in front of me, so I could hold her. She intertwined her fingers with mine. I held her tight, we were lost in the music together. I know your thinking its a cheesy moment, but its like we were in sync with one another. I have never enjoyed this part of being with someone. It has always been physical relationships. Now I was encompassed in every aspect, physical, emotional, even mentally.

"You are so beautiful", I whispered in her ear, taken a little nibble

She turned around, putting her hands on my face, pulling me in for a tender, sweet kiss. Letting me know she appreciated the compliment. I put my hands in her hair deepening the kiss, the next song, only making the kisses grow more frantic. We started exploring each others bodies, over and underneath our clothing. We were getting hot and heavy in the moment.

"Come with me", she said yanking me through the crowd

We ended up in a dark corner, past all of the closed concession stands. She started undoing my jeans, then immediately threw her tank top to the side. The sight of her in her black strapless bra sent me over the edge. My cock was at attention. I pulled her in and started kissing all over her body

"Qui se sent si bon ", she said in betweens moans

What? She is speaking French, that is so fucking hot.

I slipped a finger inside of her hot sex. She was so wet and warm. I wanted to taste her so bad, my mouth was watering. I slammed her against the wall, kissing her again, but more passionatley and rough. We were moaning into each others mouths. I slipped another finger inside of her, pumping in and out of her faster, making her hips jump.

"Bella, you are so wet" I told her, while panting trying to catch my breath

"Do you see what you do to me"? I asked her

"Oui, oui", she said, talking in French again, knowing the effect it was having on me.

I couldn't take it anymore, I pulled my hard cock out of my boxers, teasing her entrance.

"I want to be inside you", I growled in her ear

"Je tiens à vous sentir en moi ", she moaned back

The foreign tongue was making me so hot I was about to cum, so I slammed my cock inside of her. She wrapped her legs around my waist, letting me deeper inside of her. We both were panting and groaning as I repeatedly slammed my cock in and out of her. In the back ground I could her the Chili Peppers singing "Aeroplane". We were both getting close.

After our fun little adventure, we headed to the concession stand to grab another round of beers. We got back to our seats for the last two songs. Tonight was amazing to say the least. I have never been with such a spontaneous women. She drove me wild. This other side of me was coming out. The cocky bastard was slowly fading away. It's a good thing, I think. We talked the whole car ride. We always had great conversations. Bella is hilarious, she always had me cracking up. We went back to my place.

"Edward, your place is amazing", she spouted out

"Thank you Bella, have a seat"

She walked around running her finger down my couch before she took a seat in my black leather chair.

"Grey Goose martini"?

"Why, yes thank you", she said, and "thank you for coming tonight"

I gave her, her drink and sat down on the couch beside her. I love that look she had in her eyes. She stood up while liking the vodka off her lips and came over and straddled me. I'm sure she could feel that throbbing bulge in my pants, that one little move made me hard for her again. She always took control, it was so new to me, but I was addicted to it, she was my drug. Then as per usual she took me again, all of me. She had my heart, my body, and my soul.


	8. Under Construction

**Author's note-- I do not own Twilight Characters**

**Please send some love/ suggestions/ questions --- just something, it makes my heart smile! =0)**

We had more drinks, popped in a movie and talked all night, not even bothering to get dressed again. I was really starting to let my guard down with her, it was nice to be very honest with someone. She told me about her first love, he had died in a plane crash. I now understood all the guys she always had around, its easier not to get too attached when your seeing several people, I knew this from my own experience. It makes you keep your feelings in check. I never let myself love someone, she did and lost him. I can't even imagine how that felt. It makes me loathe most of my history.

"When he passed, my heart broke ...... it's still in pieces" she said almost tearing up. "I would never let myself get there again, love was not for me."

I held her closer, trying to comfort her. I wanted to mend her heart back together, I knew now that this would take time. She was dark blue, stained from previous days.

I picked her up bridal style and carried her to my room, giving her sweet kisses on her forehead. To your surprise, I never brought girls to my room. I usually went to there place or had my way with them in the living room or spare bedroom. My bedroom was my sanctuary, I had always kept it that way. I didn't want to have a collection of bountiful women housed in my covers. I laid her down in the middle of my bed. We just stared into each others eyes. I could see the pain in hers. She bit down on her lip as it trembled. I kissed her eyes closed. Wanting so badly to kiss the pain away. I kissed every inch of her face, slowly working my way down to her neck. She moved her head to the side, so I would have easier access. I kissed her collarbone, down her breast, to her perfect little six pack. Instead of rushing and acting like animals, we were taking the time to explore one another's bodies. I was amazed how every curve fit so perfectly with mine, like two puzzles pieces. I wanted to know every part of her body. Every touch, how she responded to it, every freckle or mark, I wanted to know exactly where it laid on her body. I came back up to her face to give her gentle soft kisses on her lips. She was running her fingers through my unruly hair, I loved it. I stopped kissing her to look into her eyes again, hoping I could see in her eyes what she was feeling. A tear started rolling down her left cheek. I kissed it away.

"I want to mend your heart", I whispered softly into her ear

Another tear rolled down her cheek when she blinked.

I started kissing her luscious lips and nibbling on her bottom lip. She pushed me over on my back and straddled me again, pulling her hair up into a pony tail, giving my the best view of her naked body. She kissed my face, down my stomach to my happy trail. She grabbed my hard cock with both hands, stroking it from the tip to the base slowly. My little vixen is back to tease me again. I gave her my crooked smile to let her know, I knew what she was doing. She licked the tip repeatedly, making me harder. She then took every inch of me in her mouth, I could feel the tip at the back of her throat. I just watched her take me in and out of mouth, using her tongue for extra pleasure. She was still gentle, not being our usual animalistic selves. I stopped her and moved her to her back, before I came. I wanted to be inside her again when I cum. I moved slowly down to her hot sex, slowly slipping a finger into her warmth. I slowly started licking her clit and in between her lips while moving my finger in and out of her. She tastes so sweet, I want to lick every bit of her up. I added another finger still pumping in and out of her, my tongue still teasing her clit. I want her to cum all over my face.

"Edward, Oh ...... Edward," she screamed pulling my head closer into her. letting me know where she wanted me.

"Oh .....yes ..... mmmmmm", she panted, grabbing my hair.

Then she pulled me up to her face.

"What"? I asked her

"I want you inside me" she stated

I then put my cock at her entrance, teasing her and using her arousal to lube my cock with. I slowly eased myself into her. We moaned in unison. I slowly moved in and out of her, slowly picking up the pace. She was meeting me thrust to thrust. I started kissing her roughly as I was getting close. I could feel she was too, her walls were tightening. I slid my hand down her body lifting her leg to push me even deeper inside of her. The pressure was building, I needed release, I just wanted to hold out a little longer. Our kissed started getting more and more frantic, our hands exploring all other our bodies.

"Fuck me harder" she cried

The desperation her in voice only making me come closer. I pulled her other leg up, placing both of them behind my neck. I rammed my cock inside of her a few more times, us coming simultaneously.

I rolled off her, spooning her while we caught our breath, brushing her hair off of her face and nibbling on her ear.

"réparer moi", she breathed

Before I knew it I had drifted off to sleep.

I woke up, not wanting to open my eyes yet, I had the worse case of cotton mouth ever. I moved my arm hoping to reach for Bella. Nothing. I opened my eyes .... her side ... empty. I got up to check the bathroom. Nope. The kitchen. Nope. Balcony. Nope.

She was gone.


	9. Return of Saturn

**Author's note -- do not own Twilight characters**

**Please review -- I write more and better when I'm happy and reviews make me happy**

**enjoy!**

All the assistants in my company were going to a workshop this week and next week, so I figured I would go ahead and take the day off. I haven't had a day to lounge around in months, it would probably be good for me. Plus I didn't have a lot going on at work, at least nothing that was urgent. I made coffee and sat out on my balcony enjoying the cool morning breeze. The view is intoxicating, I loved watching all the people. Some rushing to get where they needed to be, others just taking in the big city. I still couldn't help myself though, Bella was running through my mind again. I could still smell her on me, the sweet scent of strawberries and freesia. These unfamiliar feelings I have, could not be composed.

I decided to take a long, hot bath this morning. Which is strange since I don't think I have ever used it in the six years I have lived here. Then I find myself daydreaming of her being in the bath with me, sitting in between my legs while I wash her. After drying off, I threw on some dark wash jeans and an Ed Hardy t-shirt. I rarely used my other clothes since I was always earing suits. While bending down to grab my tennis shoes under my bed, I saw a piece of paper on the floor. My place was always spotless, thanks to Maria my housekeeper, so I was a little curious.

_Good Morning Edward,_

_I forgot about the workshop this week, so I needed to leave early to collect things from my office._

_ I didn't want to wake you. My lunch break is at noon if you want to meet me._

_Missing you,_

_Bella_

At that moment I think I was jumping up and down with joy. She didn't just leave. It must have fallen on the floor when I pounced up this morning from here absence. I then sighed with relief, she wanted me as well. We were more than just a good fuck to each other. I can't believe how happy I am to be in a real relationship. I could have everything, now the only problem is work. Can she stay my assistant? Jessica was due anytime now and I knew she wanted to come back if possible. No need to worry right now, we are taking this slow, so we will discuss it when the time comes.

I heard my phone buzz, I had a text.

_La Madeleine?_

_- B_

It was Bella, it was after 11 and she wanted to have lunch with me today. I think it will be nice. We will actually do something that doesn't lead to drinking and sex.

_Sounds great, see you at 12_

_-E_

I decided to bring my laptop, just in case any of the other assistants had decided to go there, then at least it would look like business and not pleasure. I arrived a bit early, knowing they get crowded fast. I opened my laptop and went through the thirty plus e-mails I had. The first one was a reminder of the silent auction I was attending in a few weeks, they needed to know if I was bringing a guest. Without even thinking I put that Bella would be attending as well, hopefully she would come with me. I always enjoyed these events, there were always unusual things to bid on, outlandish vacations, jewelry, celebrity dates, and more. My younger sister Alice was a stylist for several famous people, so I thought I would shoot her an email to get me something to wear to this, since it was a black tie event and I didn't want to wear my tux. Before I could even get to the next email, Alice had already sent me one back. Eager little pixie.

_Edward,_

_I would love to! Do you have a date? I can dress her as well._

_Love ya,_

_Alice_

That little pixie just loves dressing people up. She was the reason I dress well, she always sends me things and takes me shopping. As annoying as she can be, she was good at what she does. Before I could even send her something back, I caught a glimpse of my Bella in the corner of my eye. She looked absolutely beautiful wearing a striped crinkled tank dress.

"Edward"! She yelled, with the biggest smile ever

I kissed her cheek and led her towards the line to order food.

"How was your morning"? I asked her

"Hm, interesting to say the least", she said while crinkling her nose

"I thought it would be informative", I laughed out, knowing how boring and redundant workshops can be.

"So, I'm guessing you didn't go into work today", she said while examining my outfit.

"P.O.B.B"

"What"? She squealed

"Privilege of being boss"

We ordered our food, I got the chicken salad sandwich, and she had the spinach we ate, we laughed and talked about our families. Her father is the police chief in Forks, Washington and her mother had passed away a few years ago from cancer. I invited her to the silent auction, she agreed to go with me. She seemed really excited about it. Bella even agreed to let me crazy sister dress her, even though I might regret that later. I was on cloud nine, nothing could bring me down from this.


	10. Under the Bridge

**Author's notes -- I do not own Edward or Bella**

**Please enjoy and review**

A little over a week later

I had gotten note, that my roommate from college had passed away from an aneurysm last night, what twenty-eight year old has a freaking aneurysm? Really? I can't believe it, Fowler is dead. We were partners in crime, Laurel to my Hardey. I was languishing over the terrible news. Sitting here at my desk, in my empty office building, commemorating over the old days. The girls we chased, the parties we threw, it seems like it was only yesterday. I was just an awkward teenager when he found me. He changed my whole life, I had barely kissed girls before I met him and after, I was God. Every girl threw themselves at me, we ruled the campus.

After college we kept in touch for a bit, then he just slowly faded away. Now I'm on Expedia trying to get a flight out to San Diego to attend his funeral. Sad, just plain sad. I wish we would have kept in touch more, but that would never transpire. I didn't know much about him anymore, expect that he had a wife and two young children, twin girls. I put my head in hands, trying to figure out how to process this. Not just his death, but how short life can be. One minute your having the time of your life and the next your gone.

I have a flight booked to leave first thing tomorrow morning and will return this Saturday. I haven't been gone three days for other than business in a long time. This reminded me, take a vacation. Write that down. At least now I will have someone to enjoy it with, my Bella. Tapping my fingers on the desk, while trying to rewrite my schedule and make sure I'm back in time for the silent auction Saturday night, I hear the elevator door open. I didn't give it much thought, I just figured it was the janitor. It was about that time for them to come clean up here. Nope, it was that beautiful, leggy, girlfriend of mine.

"Edward, I'm so sorry baby",she said running into my arms, "Alice just told me when I called her back about dress options for this weekend, I came as fast as I could".

I just took her in my arms and held her. There was nothing that could be said to make it easier, I just needed her in my arms.

"Let's get you home", she said while getting up from my lap, "I will take care of anything else you need, don't you worry about a thing".

"Bella, I'm fine, it's just shocking and I feel remorseful for his family".

She sat on my desk and put her head on my shoulder.

"Sometimes life gives you a reality check, we don't always need another chance to express how we feel or to ask someone to understand your situation, sometimes we just need a good kick in the pants". I garbled

We sat in silence for sometime, I think she got the picture, talking was not going to help me, I just needed peace. I'm not sure what came over me but that confidence I had always had, flooded back into me, nope Bella wasn't going to control me tonight. I can feel the fire back on my tongue.

I pulled her head up so she was looking me in the eyes, I leaned in for a kiss. I felt the sparks running through my whole body as I always did, then I deepened the kiss. Our tongues doing a dance together in our mouths. She grabbed a fist full of my unruly hair pulling her into me. The ravish beast in me got all riled up, I pushed everything off my desk, not paying attention to throwing my expensive laptop on the floor, pushing her on her back on my desk with hard passionate kisses. I was groaning like the beast I was acting like. I sat back in my chair looking at the beautiful women lying before me, her legs spread, without a thought I pushed up her skirt and ripped her panties off of her. A small gasp escaped from her lips.

I went down on her like a fat kid in a pie eating contest. I didn't take it slow, I slipped one finger right into her hot sex, she was already wet and ready for me. I viciously licked her clit and in between her wet lips. I kept pounding my finger in and out of her, loving the sounds coming from her mouth. She had never seen this side of me before, hell I haven't either in awhile. I added another finger, pounding them in harder and faster, rubbing circles on her clit with my other hand and licking in between. I could feel her walls tightening on my fingers. Her moans would getting louder and louder, my dick harder with each moan. I couldn't take it anymore, I then pulled my throbbing cock out of my pants and slammed into her. I lifted her legs around my neck, pounding in and out of her, it was a beautiful sight watching my cock move in and out of her.

"Jeûneur, jeûneur ", she said between gasps.

"I fucking love it when you talk French to me," I grunted like a fucking caveman.

I then pulled her off of my desk turning her around so I could fuck her doggy style. I leaned her face down to my desk. I immediately entering her again, wrapping my fingers in her hair. I slapped her ass a couple of times, getting the yelps I was craving from her. I grabbed her by her hips helping me pound into her harder and harder, I couldn't help myself. We then both instantly came together, both screaming out the others name. She mumbled something in French under her breath, of course I had no idea what it meant. I never did. I just loved to hear it. As I stood there catching my breath, I couldn't help but be sorry for what I had just done. I fucked her like I did to other women. I knew it shouldn't matter, but Bella was different and deserved more. The emotions clouded my brain and I fucked her like I fucked a one night stand.

"Bella, I'm so sorry", I conveyed

She just looked at me while pulling her skirt down and picking up her ripped panties off the floor, shoving them into her purse. We didn't say anything as we left. Both looking straight ahead as we went down the elevator. It wasn't awkward silence, just what the hell just happened silence. I kissed her goodnight and told her I would call her when I got to San Diego. I watched her drive off in her black Range Rover, wishing I had invited her to stay with me tonight. Dumb ass.

As I got into my car and turned on the radio "Under the Bridge" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers was playing. Ironic isn't it? The lyrics were true, I never wanted to feel like I did today. The city was my only friend, I'm all alone.

I finally got home, knowing that I needed to pack first thing when I got home. I laid out a black suit with a white collared shirt and a black skinny tie. The rest of the time I was just going to go casual, I hoped to see friends from college to reminisce with. Then just exhausted from the day, I poured myself a glass of 1926 Macallan whiskey, I never drank this, I was saving it for a special occasion but it seemed like a good time to drink it. This bottle of whiskey was more expensive than most cars, I received from a client. I was in the mood for whiskey and was out of my usual. That was my rationalization. I went out and sat out on my balcony to enjoy the evening breeze. I loved the city wind whistling through my unruly locks.

*****KNOCKING*****

I jumped to the sound of knocking on my door. I open it to find Bella with her pillow and a bottle of Jack Daniels.

"Well, I see you already hit the bottle, can I come in"? She inquired

I motioned for her to come in grabbing her pillow from her and tossing in on the couch.

"Martini"?

"Nope, whiskey tonight"! she called out

"That's why I like you", I informed her, kissing her sweet lips already tasting of whiskey.

We sat on my balcony, her sitting in between my legs, our arms wrapped around each other. We sat in comfortable silence, I was off in my own thoughts and enjoying the warmth the whiskey gave me. I was just relishing her presence, no need to carry on a conversation. That's just how I am, sad or mad, I unwind in silence and a bit of whiskey, but mostly just the silence. When we both started dozing off, I carried her to bed and set my alarm for the morning.

"Good night love" I said, giving her a kiss on her forehead.

Before I knew it, my alarm was sounding off. It was 5:45 am, I think I got three hours of sleep. I went to take a hot shower to relax my muscles, since I had a six hour flight to look forward to.

"Edward I will take you to the airport if you like, that way you don't have to leave your car there", Bella announced

"That would be great babe"

She knew that I would not leave my precious BMW M6 coupe in an airport parking garage.

"I want to drive it"!, she exclaimed

I rose my brow at her for even thinking about it.

"Um no hun", I sneered

"Fine, fine, but I'm going in to work to fix your schedule, make a few calls, then I'm leaving to go meet Alice", she demanded

"Okay Bella, if that will make you happy, but your not touching my car", I huffed.

Someone is taking advantage of being the bosses girlfriend. I started chuckling to myself. She was so cute when she didn't get exactly what she wanted.

I'm finally on my flight waiting for the plane to take off, wondering what trouble my little sister and Bella will get into today. I had given Alice one of my credit cards to get Bella whatever she needed for Saturday, I'm pretty sure, no, for sure I will regret that later. Six hours, fifteen minutes, and four Jack on the rocks later I was in San Diego. I called Bella to let her know I got here safely, you know her thing about airplanes. Alice and her were at lunch at Piranha's Killer Sushi bar. I knew that they would get along great, which we be nice,

Alice hated every girl I had brought anywhere. The rest of the day I spent on my laptop, answering emails and looking at the schedule Bella sent to me. She was a goddess, working everything out for me perfectly, now I knew I could relax a bit. Room service and then bed was my plan for the evening. I called Bella after dinner hoping I could get little phone sex from that saucy little vixen of mine.


	11. Six feet under ground

**Author's notes - I do not own Edward or Bella or Alice**

**Please enjoy and review. I need help finding Bella's dress for the silent auction if anyone has suggestions**

_On the Phone_

"What are you wearing"?

"Nothing, I'm taking a bubble bath"

"Bubbles and a soaking wet Bella, I likey"

"Missing me"?

"All of you"

"I wish you were in the bath with me, I could clean you all up"

"You think I'm a dirty boy"?

"I know you are"

"I could send you a photo"

"What? On my phone?"

"Sending"

"I'm coming home now"

The next morning

Talk about waking up with a morning wood. It was straining so hard in my boxers it was almost hurting, it was so uncomfortable. Bella, the things you do to me even 2500 miles away. I sitting here sipping my morning coffee, wishing she was right next to me. This time apart and unfortunate events, made me realize I need to tell Bella how I feel about her. I want to be with her everyday, constantly filling my cup up with her. I will tell her Saturday, yes at, or maybe after the silent auction. Now I desperately needed a hot shower, so I could relieve myself.

I can't remember the last time I jerked off, sad I know, but why do it when you have someone do it for you? I usually would have went down to the bar and before I could finish my first drink, I would have someone meeting me in my room for a late night rendezvous. That's how it used to be. I turned the shower on hot, put one hand on the shower and just started stroking my cock softly. That's how Bella always started nice and slow, I was fantasizing about her. The first time I saw her and got a flash of her little pink lacy panties, her going comando at the Knicks game. That little vixen drives me wild, even just memories. The thoughts flowing through my brain made me start stroking faster and harder. I finally came with a loud and venomous groan. Now I can finally concentrate and get dressed, Fowler's funeral is at eleven.

I put on my black Armani suit and tried to manage my unruly hair, it was no use it has a mind of its own. I sprayed on a little cologne and straightened my tie. I look pretty damn good, if I don't say so myself. I still had some time before I needed to head out, I thought I would try to get a flight to leave tonight. I wanted to be home. The thought of Bella's bubble bath was getting me riled up again, the separation time has been too long. I have a lot of things to get caught back on for work as well. I found one, it was a red eye flight, but I didn't care, so I booked it anyway. I'm not enjoying myself here anyhow and I needed to get back to my office before next week starts. My mind started wandering, while I was staring blankly at the hundreds of emails I had and didn't even want to begin opening them. I opened the first one it was from Karrie, Fowler's wife, she was thanking me for the flowers and kind words.

I was curious about Fowler's family, what his wife looked like, who she was, how the hell someone got that man to settle down. I am thankful though, he found his "Bella", someone he could settle down with, love, and start a beautiful family with. Unfortunately life doesn't always go they way you plan, but he had it for awhile, some people go there whole lives without experiencing love. I looked at the clock and noticed time had flown by and I needed to head out now.

The funeral was good as could be expected, I payed tribute to a man that I will never forget. Its hard to say goodbye to someone that changed your life in so many ways. I barely had time to talk to his wife, she was taking it very hard, not that it was unexpected, but I just gave her my condolences and took a seat near the back. She was beautiful, light blond hair and blue eyes. The twins both looked like little replicas of her. The many speeches given were amazing, Ryan Fowler was truly an honorable man, respected and loved by so many.

The whole church was filled with family, friends, and colleagues. I think he would be happy with the turn out. They played his favorite songs, told funny stories about him. I loved the part where the priest said Ryan was always walking on a fence, he had fallen many times and this time when he fell off the fence, he fell into God's arms. That was true, it even made me smile a little. I liked thinking of it that way. I decided not to go to the burial, there were so many people it could take hours. I also liked leaving it on a happy note.

I really needed to back to the hotel and try to get some work done. I stopped at In and Out burger to grab some lunch, I was famished. When I arrived back at my hotel, I decided to check the balance on the credit card I let Alice use, to see how bad the damage was. Eight thousand dollars! Eight thousand dollars!! I'm going to strangle that little pixie. She always goes over board and probably figures I owed her something and bought stuff for herself. Great. Well no need to linger on this now, I will have to wait till I can get my hands on that little pixie. Now back to all these emails, I opened the first one, it was from Jessica my old assistant. She is due in eight weeks and plans on returning to work after the new year if possible.

She knew the her old position was filled, but wanted to work for the company if anything else would be available. If things go as planned with Bella and I, she could defiantly have her job back. I emailed her back wishing her a safe and fast delivery and that I would love to have her back when she is ready. That reminded me I needed to send her a gift. I'll just shoot Alice an email to get Jessica and the baby something since she already has my card and probably would get her something better than I would. Well I know she would, I would give up and get a gift card. I'm surely going to be broke after she gets done with me. Not but a minute later, she sent me one back.

_Edward,_

_Sure, I would love to get Jessica something and if you don't mind I'm putting my_

_ name on it as well. Also I just adore Bella we had a fabulous time. You will love _

_her dress. Please don't kill me when you get the bill. I bought you a winter wardrobe, _

_your so last season! =0)_

_Love ya,_

_Alice_

Sometimes I wonder if she is ever really working, hm, oh well. Back to work it is. Email after email of crap. We need a meeting here, donate money there ... AHHH, seriously I need that vacation. Usually I'm all work no play till night time but I think it has finally caught up with me. Work was siphoning me. Instead of continuing the slew of emails, I decided to run down to the pool and swim a few laps, maybe work off that greasy burger from earlier.

I walked down and luckily found it empty, except a young women who was sun bathing. I dove in, enjoying the cold water on my skin. I came back up for a breath, and slicked all my wet hair back. I noticed from the corner of my eye, that the girl was now sitting on the edge of the pool. I looked over at her, she looked very familiar.

"Edward Cullen"? She asked

"Yes" I answered her

"I'm Holly Fowler, Ryan's cousin".

"Hi Holly, sorry I didn't know it was you, I thought you looked familiar".

"No worries, I had a lot of work done since college", she announced

Holly went to the same college as Fowler and I. She hung out with us when she first arrived to college since she didn't know anyone else. She was a short chubby girl, with a crooked nose and mousy brown hair, well the exact opposite from now. She is thin, and a blond bombshell. I couldn't help it, but I was gawking while I wandered.

"Are you in town long"? she questioned

"I'm actually leaving tonight, good old red eye flight". I uttered

"That's too bad, isn't it?" "I was hoping we could catch up".

She slid herself down into the pool waters walking over to be. I just froze like the imbecile I am. I knew what she was doing, I have seen it a million times. Yet, I just stood there. She continued her way to me, brushing the lock of hair that had fallen in my face when she approached me, standing in my personal space.

"How about an early dinner"? she proclaimed, practically rubbing herself on my crotch.

I knew what she meant by that, usually that meant skip dinner and straight to sex. She knew me, how I was before Bella. She had always thrown herself at me when we were in college, but she also didn't look like she does now. Oh the things money can buy. My heart finally shut off my dick from talking to my brain. I slowly got out of the pool.

"Holly, I'm sorry I forgot to make an important phone call", I told her while grabbing my towel and heading back to my room.

As soon as I got back to my room, I jumped in to the shower to get the chlorine out of my hair. I finished up and as soon as I turned the water off, I heard a knock at the door. Thinking nothing of it, I wrapped a towel around my waist and answered the door. It was Holly. She pushed herself in shutting the door and locking it behind her.

"Edward, I don't think you understood me at the pool" she said while pushing me on the bed

******ringing********

"Hello, Edward Cullen's phone", Holly said while answering my phone

"Edward's busy right now, can I take a message"? Holly told the person on the phone.

I think at that moment my heart stopped, I couldn't believe this little bitch just grabbed my phone and answered it. Trying to yank the phone from her to see who was on the phone, praying it wasn't Bella, she said the words I loathed to hear.

"Sure Bella, I'll let him know you called", Holly told her, with a grin only the devil's child could give.

I couldn't breath, I didn't say a word to Holly. I yanked up by her arm and practically threw her out of my room. I ran to grab my phone and double check the caller ID.

My worst nightmare.


	12. Love Fool

**Author's notes- Please enjoy this chapter and review**

Really? How can this be happening to me? I finally get all the shit worked out in the complex head of mine and now this. I can't even begin to comprehend how I am going to get out of this one. Bella is bullheaded, she probably has already moved on. *sighs*

Rubbing my hands on my face in frustration I pick up my phone, staring at the scene saver, its a picture of Bella and I sitting on my balcony. I just want to call her and tell her it was nothing, just some crazy bitch that barged herself in my hotel room. Who would believe that, it sounds like a load of crap. I would hope that she would know if I was lying, I could defiantly come up with a better excuse than that. I scrolled down to her number, I have to do this and now. Nope, I just sat here and stare at it, like a freaking idiot.

Cullen, all you have to do is push the green button with the phone on it, its not hard.... PUSH IT! I slammed my phone shut. It's mocking me. My fucking phone is mocking me. Grow some balls.

Be a man and call the girl you love and fix this. I have to do this, I can do this. Still staring at my phone like its some foreign object. Afraid to touch it. Pathetic Cullen, completely and utterly pathetic. I closed my eyes, trying to block out the images of what I think Bella is thinking about this stupid situation.

I picked up my phone and hit send.

****ringing*****

"Hello", she said in the most cold tone, it made me shiver.

"Bella, sorry about that it's not what you think", I confessed.

"Mr. Cullen, I was just calling to let you know your flight has been delayed due to mechanical problems, I just sent you an e-mail with your new flight info", she scolded.

Mr. Cullen? She must be pissed because she only called me that at work, out of respect and due to not going public yet.

"Bella, it was Ryan's cousin, she just barged into my room", I said before she cut me off.

"Sorry Mr. Cullen, I'm out with friends, have a safe flight", she informed me.

****dial tone****

FUCK.

SHIT.

I threw my head down into my hands, with defeat. I didn't expect anything less from her. She's not one to shout and accuse someone. She wasn't like other girls who would scream and cry about being cheated on. Bella would shrug it off, have vodka martini and get on with her life. The worst thing is that I didn't cheat and never would. I have never cheated, I never let myself actually be with someone. I just pray that I get the chance to tell her that and she believes me. Bella is probably over it and out drinking with some handsome guy that isn't some infamous player. A supervision is what I need.

I need to talk to her in person, it will be the only way. Why is this happening? Can't life just be easy and we fall in love and live happily ever after. I probably don't deserve one, but I want it. Now my flight is tomorrow morning, so it will be even longer before I see her. The universe is against me. Completely against me. This is just a cruel and unusual punishment.

Since I was stuck in this wretched town, I needed to go and have a drink or two, maybe three. The bar downstairs was totally out of the question, so I decided to walk down to the Piano Bar down the street. I was going to get fucked up, I knew that for sure, so I didn't want to drive and end up defacing a rent car.

"What can I get you sir"? The bartender asked

"Scotch on the rocks, make it a double" I answered quickly

I looked around, luckily the place was fairly empty. I knew I wouldn't be bothered by anyone, well hopefully. The bartender handed me my drink and I took a huge swig. I wanted all these feelings to just go away. Right now it would be great if I just couldn't feel at all. Numb. That would be good.

"Bartender, I'll have another", I called out,"Just leave the bottle".

Before I knew it I was chugging them down one after another .

"Hard day"? The bartender implied

"Hit by a bus", I spouted, while sipping on my drink

"Does this bus have a name"? he asked

"Bella"

I don't even remember how I got back to my room, all I know is that bartender over served me. Hopefully I paid my tab and left a generous tip. I laid down on the bed due to the room spinning. Closing my eyes, wondering where my Bella is. Hoping she was home safe and alone. I did the worst thing anyone in my state could do. Drunk calling. I called her cell phone not even thinking about the time difference, no answer, it went straight to voice mail.

"I'm so sorry, so sorry", I slurred into the phone on Bella's voice mail

"Bella, I love you and want you to love me BACK!" I garbled on

The room continued to spin.

"There aren't fucking tornadoes in California", I mumbled out

--------

**********ringing********

What the fuck is that?

********ringing**********

Stupid phone, shut up

I picked up the hotels phone to stop the ringing, it was killing my head.

"What"? I grunted

"Good morning Mr. Cullen, this is your 8 am wake up call", a way too peppy girl for this time in the morning said.

I rubbed my eyes, I was hung over. Well that's probably an understatement, I was probably still drunk. I didn't even want to move. I looked and was still in my clothes from last night. FUCK. I need to be packed and out to the airport in an hour. I took the worlds fastest shower and crammed all my things into my suitcase. I ran to the parking garage and drove off to the airport as fast as humanly possible. I checked in and went to find my gate at the airport, somehow I still had some time so I went to one of the many stores to grab some advil and a coke. I needed some relieve from my throbbing head ache and all the rushing around wasn't helping.

Finally it was time to board the plane and I was starving, hopefully they were serving some good breakfast, I need some good hangover food and fast. Thank goodness with the other flight being cancelled they still had first class seats available.

"Can I get you something to eat sir? Pillow? Blanket?" The Pamela Anderson look-a-like stewardest asked

"Biscuits and gravy with a side of bacon, orange juice and the fluffiest pillow you have", I told her

I needed some food in my belly to help soak up some of this alcohol. I inhaled my breakfast and leaned my seat back so I could sleep off my hangover. Also to not beleaguer over Bella the whole flight. Six hours of that would surely drive me to my end. Closing my eyes I drifted quickly off to sleep.

-------

I arrived in back in New York around 4:15, I grabbed a taxi to get me straight over to work, hoping Bella didn't decide to head out before 5 today. Finally luck was on my side as I run frantically from the elevator, like a mad man. Bella was still typing away at her computer, looking beautiful as ever. She is always so stunning, wearing a grosgrain plaid dress. I slowed my walk down the hall to her office. I felt myself becoming unstrung, hands getting sweaty, unease creeping back into my stomach. Breathe in, breathe out. I knocked lightly on her door with my knuckles, still carrying my luggage. I could almost taste the bile rising in my throat from the anticipation.

"Come in" she called out

I opened the door, dropped my luggage beside me.

"Bella, I ...................."


	13. Simple kind of life

**A/N - SM owns Twilight Characters**

**Please make my heart smile and review**

**Read and enjoy -- Thanks**

"Bella, I .... I'm so sorry, please let me explain", I requested

"Edward don't", she said before I cut her off

"Please let me just tell you what happened", I pleaded, "I ran straight here from the airport Bella please, I just need five minutes."

"I don't need an explanation from you", she replied

I looked at her in confusion, why didn't she need an explanation from me. We can work this out. She finally stopped typing and got up from her desk. I just wanted to hold her in my arms again. It feels like forever since I have touched her. My breathing started picking up, I was panicking. Foreign emotions creeping back into me, I was scared. I found her and now I'm going to lose her and there is nothing I can do.

"It's not what you think, I didn't sleep with her, she just barged into my room and you happened to call, and she answered it. I promise ..... on my ... on my car nothing happened." I rambled on, "I would never do anything to hurt you Bella, please believe me".

She just stood there with this smirk on her face. I was confused by the meaning of it. I was completely taken aback. I closed my eyes, I could feel defeat racing through my veins. My breathing not slowly down, my heart was still racing. There was probably nothing I could sayor do at this point, it was ridiculous, who would believe that story. I started to turn around to head to my office, not even bothering about my luggage on the floor. I could get it eyes staring down out the floor, reminding me to schedule to get it shampoo-ed. How did this become such a blunder?

"Alice took me to lunch today and told me everything", she spouted out

"Huh?" I said whisking back around,"Everything?"

"You obvouisly did quite a bit of drunk dialing last night", she snickered

"I talked to Alice last night?" I inquired

"Yes, and my voice mail box"

I could feel how huge my eyes were now, I gasped. It probably looked like I had just seen a ghost. What had I done, worst of all what had I said. Damn you scotch!

"Don't worry, I got it, some girl tried throwing herself at you and didn't want to take no for an answer, I get it, now get over here." She proclaimed

I slowly walked over to her, she grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me in for a kiss. Mmm, how I missed those lips.

"So ...... you love me?" she asked not letting go of my shirt.

Next thing I knew she was playing my drunken message to her on speaker phone. She had a huge grin on her face. That's not exactly how I had planned to tell her I love her, but what's done is done. She looked into my eyes, her chocolate browns staring with question. I didn't want to deny it or shrug it off. So I grabbed her hands into mine, intertwining our fingers.

"Bella I love you" I spoke smoothly

I tried to block out, that I was telling her this for the first time, well the first time I have told any women, in her freaking office. I had no intention of ever telling her this way, I wanted it to be a special moment. It needed to be said in person, not in a voice mail in a drunken stupor. Why do I have to be such an idiot all the time? I can handle a multimillion dollar company, but I'm an complete moron when it comes to relationships.

"I love you too" she told me, giving me a sweet, tender kiss

Holy shit! She said it back, she loves me too. I wanted to jump up for joy, like a giddy little school girl. She loved me back. That stupid little bitch hadn't ruined everything. I could feel the relief from those three little words. Cloud nine where are you, cause I'm jumping back on.

"Let's get you home", Bella called out

We grabbed my luggage and headed for the elevator. I gave her a kiss on her forehead while we were waiting for the doors to open. Once we stepped into the elevator, I knew everything was going to different from now on. This time I wasn't afraid of change, I was taking it on full force. This is what I had been waiting for. My simple kind of life.

She drove us back in her car, I loved the smell of it, vanilla. One thing I loved about her is she is extremely clean, not like Monica from Friends, but clean. Her car doesn't look like its ever been driven in, considering its four years old. We drove in silence, holding hands, just enjoying one anothers presence. I like that we don't feel the need to have to fill silence with mindless conversations. I was so exhausted and couldn't wait to be home. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, she gave my hand a little squeeze. I probably had the stupidest smirk on my face, but it didn't matter. Life is good again. I let out a huge sigh, I was so happy. Sitting here with her, reminds me in how just short time I have changed, for the better. She has made me a better man. If I had only knew what a relationship was before, maybe I would have tried it, but I'm so glad I found it with Bella. I finally found myself with her.

We finally got back to my condo, luckily Maria had come when I was gone to tidy up, I threw my things down and pulled Bella in for another kiss. I couldn't help myself, I couldn't get enough of her. Before we could even deepen the kiss, I grabbed her and took her straight to my bedroom. I took her by her waist and laid her down on my bed. I missed her so much. I have never missed someone so much in my life. I just wanted to breathe her in. Mmmm, strawberries. My favorite smell in the whole wide world. I sat up straddling her, running my hands down her arms, I missed her silky smooth skin, her deep chocolate eyes, and long brown hair. I wanted to make a mental picture of her like she is now, to store away and keep in my mind forever. I guess I was gawking too long because she was giving me a funny look.

"What is it"? she asked

"I just missed your face" I told her

Before she could say another word, I kissed her lips again, gentle and sweet. She grabbed a fist full of my hair, pulling me in closer, making me moan in her mouth. I then went diving for the spot where her neck meets her shoulder, kissing and licking, she tastes so good. I wanted to taste her whole body. I started kissing back up at her chin, back down to her neck again. She started moaning and bucking her hips. I fucking loved it when she moaned, I could her that forever and never tire of it. I kissed all the way back up to her lips, I was already missing them again. I pulled up from her face and heard a grumble. I gave Bella a funny look.

"It was my stomach, I didn't eat much at lunch" she admitted

I grabbed her hand, helping her up from my bed.

"Let's order some take out" I expressed, because I was starving as well.

We decided to just order pizza. It was funny we both blurted it out at the same time, no arguing about it or making one person pick. I opened a bottle of 2001 Cabernet Sauvignon Alexander Valley. I needed to lay of the scotch for a bit and nothing goes better with pizza than red wine. We took our drinks to the balcony looking at the beautiful New York night. It was strangely quiet, which was actually kind of nice change. She told me about her last couple of days and how much she enjoyed Alice's company. I think there are best friends already, which may or may not be an advantage for me. She continued on about her night out with friends and how she really missed me. Before we knew it the pizza had arrived. I grabbed a blanket from the closet and set up a little picnic on the living room floor. Bella insisted that we watch Knocked Up. She loved to watch comedies. The night was absolutely sublime. Me, my girl, and one hella greasy pizza, that's all I need.

"Edward, it's getting late and I have a lot of thing to do tomorrow"

"Please stay, I just got home."

"I know baby, but I wasn't expecting you back till tomorrow and we both know we will not be doing a lot of sleeping"

I gave her my best pouty face, I can't believe she didn't want to stay the night.

"I'll be good", I told her in my best boyish tone, "Please, please, please"?

She rolled her eyes and I knew she would give in.

We headed back to my bed since she had to get up at the crack of dawn. The silent auction was tomorrow at seven and I knew she had lots of girlie things to do. I gave her one of my old college t-shirts to sleep in. That was a sight to see, even in a ratty old shirt she was a vision. We laided down on the bed snuggling each other, leggings and arms all intertwined.

"Good night, I love you" I whispered

"I love you too baby", she uttered

I wanted to tell her to say those five small words over and over. I couldn't hear then too many times. It made my heart smile just hearing them, before I could even think about asking, I drifted soundly off to sleep.


	14. Everything in time

**A/N- SM owns Twilight character**

**I enjoy reviews, so please send me one**

"Mm mm, that feels good."

My eyes are still closed, I must be dreaming. My breathing starting to pick up from the pleasure, I'm afraid to open my eyes. Something warm on my ......

"Yes!", I yelled as I sat up.

What did I see, but my wonderful girlfriend giving me a morning blow job.

She continued sucking like nothing happened, ignoring that her idiot boyfriend just yelled. Taking my full length in her mouth, I growled while pulling at her hair. Oh her beautiful mouth, the things it does to me. I laid back down, enjoying the sensation. She cupped my balls, playing with them as she started licking the tip of my hard cock. Twirling and twirling her tongue, teasing me. I wanted back in her warm mouth. She continued teasing me licking up and down my shaft slowly, still playing with my balls. I started bucking my hips to let her know I was through with the teasing. I still had my eyes shut, hoping if this was a dream I wasn't waking up yet. She got the hint and slowly started taking every little inch of my dick, using her tongue as she engulfed me. Then her pace quickened, bobbing up and down, again and again. I couldn't help myself, I had to see this. I opened my eyes to the beautiful sight, only spiraling me to my release. Emptying myself in her mouth, while she swallowed every last drop.

I was panting hard, trying to catch my breath as she sat up and straddled me, licking her lips. Now that is what I call sexy.

"Can I get that kind of wake up call every morning?" I proposed

She never did answer me, she gave me a wicked grin and headed off towards the bathroom. I'm hoping that was at least a maybe.

I finally got up and went to the kitchen to make some coffee and croissants with cheese and sausage. She defiantly deserved some breakfast after that wake up call and I had already worked up a hunger this morning. As I put the croissants in the oven Bella came pouncing out of my room, its disgusting how much of a morning person she is, but you got to love it. She walked up to me a gave me a swift kiss on the cheek. I handed her her coffee, just the way she likes it with soy vanilla milk.

"You got me my own cup?" she inquired, smiling at the pink coffee cup with white polka dots.

"I thought you might like having your own here"

"Thank you honey"

She just smiled and sipped away on her coffee. I wanted her to feel like she could have a few of her own things her. Hopefully that didn't scare her. She walked out on to the balcony while I waited for breakfast to finish cooking. She loved being out there, just like I did. I have sat out on my balcony almost every morning since I moved in six years ago. She looked radiant in the morning sunlight, the winding twirling her hair in the air. Leaning against the railing watching the few cars and people pass by. This early on a Saturday was usually pretty peaceful, most still hiding away in there homes. I brought the croissants out for us to share, with a small arrangement of fruit. I made each of us a small plate and handed her one.

"Mmm, these are delicious Edward"

"Thanks love"

"I have to leave her soon, I'm meeting Alice for yoga this morning" she voiced

"At 24 hour fitness?"

"Yes, the 8am class, want to come?"

"Not to yoga, but I would like to swim some laps and catch a glimpse of my sexy girlfriend doing yoga", I concluded

"I bet you would" she said all smirky like, "Go get dressed we have to go".

I ran on the treadmill for about twenty minutes, before I headed to the pool to cool off. Luckily it was early and no one was in the pool area but me. Actually there we not a lot of people at the gym at all, I guess its not a popular place Saturday mornings. There were a few women and me. Hopefully I didn't look like some perv gawking at women while they work out. I swam for about an hour, knowing that Alice and Bella's class would be finished around 9:30. After I headed for the locker room to take a quick shower to rinse the chlorine out of my hair. I started the water and undressed, leaving my towel near by. I was humming to myself when I caught a glimpse of something from the corner of my eye. I saw someone in a black baseball hat come in, I thought nothing of it and continued my shower. While washing my face, I felt someone grab my ass. Full ass cheek grab. I could feel my face turning red from anger, some dude didn't just grab my bare ass. What the hell was he thinking? I clenched my fist together as I turned around, ready to give this chump a black eye.

"What the fuck", I yelled

Only to see that the person in the baseball cap was Bella. I chuckled to myself, only she would come grab my ass in the men's locker room. Bella never ceased to amaze me, that girl has some balls. Nothing scared her, she was spontaneous and confident.

"Watching you swim got me all hot and bothered", she whisepred in my ear, then nibbled it.

Before I could say anything, she had me pinned to the shower wall kissing me madly. Her hands running wildly all over my body. The water was still on and soaking Bella, getting me hotter than her just being in her. I could see straight through her white t-shirt. I pulled it over her head, trying not the break our kiss. Then I started trailing kisses down her neck to her breast. They were even more luscious looking soaking wet. I removed her sports bra, only to plow my face back into her breast, sucking and teasing her nipples. She grabbed my cock and started stroking it. That threw me over the edge, I've never been so turned on. My kisses then started trailing down her stomach towards her hot spot, I pulled her shorts and panties off, leaving her only in her flip flops. I moved back up to her lips, taking in her bottom lip, giving it a little nibble, making her moan. We continued kissing hot and heavy, I pinched her clit while giving it a slight pull hoping for another moan. Nothing yet so I slide my finger in her hot, warm sex making. Finally receiving the moan I was craving, only making me moan right back. I started slowly moving my fingers in and out of her, our breathing picking up, only making our kisses more frantic and needy.

"Fuck me", she demanded, grabbing a fist full of my hair and attacking my neck with kisses.

I shoved my hard cock inside of her, making her gasp. I love being inside of her, so warm and tight. I was already getting to the brink. I grabbed her hips, while she wrapped her legs around my waist and I continued pumping my cock in and out of her tight little pussy. It was so wet from her juices and the shower. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Say something in French", I growled at her biting her bottom lip

"Je t'aime, je t'aime " she uttered between breathes

Her continuous moaning and foreign tongues were sending me over the edge, I knew I couldn't hold out much longer. I pushed her up against the shower wall, so I could rub her clit while I continued fucking her. I could feel her walls clamping around my hard cock as I rubbed tiny circles over her clit. One final thrust and we came together in ecstasy.

We kissed eachother one last time before she grabbed her clothes, my towel and headed to the girls locker room. Thanks now I have no towel.

It was an hour before I needed to pick Bella up for the silent auction. I was hoping the items were as lavish as last year. I had my clothes spread out on my bed that Alice had picked out for me. It was a heather gray suit perfectly tailored for my body, with the matching vest, white button down and a tonal stripe silver tie. I really loved it and I think Bella will too. I'm a simple man, so I'm glad Alice didn't get some crazy pink or purple tie. I know its in style but I just can't bring myself to wear something like that. I got dressed making sure everything looked perfect down to every detail. I grabbed wallet, keys, and headed down to my car. I had it detailed this afternoon, she looks fabulous. I'm in love with her all over again.

I arrived at Bella's right on time, I am very punctual. She opened the door and I think my jaw hit the floor. There are no words to describe how beautiful she looks. A long black chiffon gown, see-thru in all the right places, a neck line so low, I think it was near her belly button. I sat there gawking forever it seemed. I have seen her without clothes but something about this dress is driving me wild. I wanted to take her straight to her bedroom and have my way with her. I felt my member instantly stand at attention. She also wore a few layered silver necklaces and short one with a diamond. Her hair was down in curly waves. We looked perfect together, linked arm and arm. I kissed her cheek after I was done ogling her. She gave me a small laugh, because I knew she had caught me.

"Your look stunningly beautiful Ms. Swan"

"You don't look too bad yourself", she smirked while I spun her around getting a view from every angle.

I really owe Alice a thank you for this dress. I need to remember to get her something special from Tiffany's. We jumped in my car heading straight to the silent auction, I was hoping to bid on a extravagant vacation for Bella and I to go on. I wanted to have a whole week of just me and her. We arrived fashionably late, traffic was a total nightmare. Every year this event grew. I introduced Bella to many of my friends, most through business and a few near and dear. They all loved her and were completely delighted to see me with someone, more than my usual one night stands. We drank champagne and both bid on a few items. I found out tonight, Bella is very well off, her ex-fiance had left her quite a little money egg. She has only spoken about him a few times, never giving me a lot of information. Tonight she told me he was a trust fund baby and had left it all to her. I was a little taken back from that, but she said that he had a put her in the will as soon as the wedding date was set. Sometimes I want to ask her more about him, but I'm still not sure if she's okay with it. The rest of the evening was magical we snacked on delicious hors'dourves and drank ourselves silly. I won us a seven night stay to Waikiki Beach in Hawaii and Bella won a L.A.M.B purse donated by Gwen Stefani. I laughed about how excited she was about winning. Nothing makes me happier than seeing her smile. After saying our goodbyes, I led Bella out towards the valet while we waited for my car. I stood behind her holding her close, swaying us back and forth.

"Did you enjoy yourself, beautiful?", I whispered in her ear.

She squeezed my arms, "I did, thank you", she said tilting her head back to give me a gentle kiss.

Thankfully the valet showed up with my car before that one little kiss turned into a full on make-out session. I slipped the valet a fifty for taking special care of my baby and thanked him even though he was staring Bella up and down. I opened the car door for Bella and helped her inside, giving her a kiss on the forehead before shutting the door.

"I was thinking we could go to Coney Island tomorrow" I suggested to her

"I'm sorry Edward, I have some things I have to do tomorrow", she replied

I was confused by her vague answer. What things? Can you be more specific please? Would it be rude to ask? I couldn't help myself. I wanted to know.

"Do you have a date or something?" I asked harshly

"Really Edward?" she scolded me

If looks could kill the one she just gave me would have. Needless to say the rest of the car ride was quite, I took the cue that she wasn't staying the night. That gorgeous dress was going to waste, I so had planned on fucking her in it. Sometimes I feel like Bella is Jekyll and Hyde, how could our magical evening end on this note.


	15. Comforting Lie

**A/N - please review and enjoy**

Complete and utter dumb ass. I have proven that once again. I could have said anything else. Anything. No, I have to be an imbecile and ask if she had a date. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why do I insist on doing this to myself? Bella completely shakes my confidence and I become a total douche bag. I have never been the jealous type, usually I would have said cool, whatever and went on with the evening. Then I would have had my way with her and the dress. I haven't been myself though. Then again, wouldn't she be a little peeved if I brushed her off like that? I also didn't give her time to explain, before I intruded with a ridiculous accusation. I should just stay here in bed all day, I can't make things worse here. My bed is my only safety net. I'm feeling empty as a widow, I should just sleep my life away. Well, probably not, because I'm already getting really antsy.

I finally rolled out of bed, already starting on the wrong foot. I knew I wouldn't be myself. I went to start some coffee and just my luck I'm out of filters. Great, just great. I guess I will head down the block to Starbucks and pay five dollars for fifty cents worth of coffee. Just another reason to make me want to run back into bed and never come out. After deciding I can't hide forever I put on a pair of black track pants, t-shirt and a baseball hat to hide my more than usual bed head. I wanted to call Bella and apologize for being an idiot, hopefully she would explain what she was up to today and that would ease all the pain. Then maybe my day wouldn't suck half as bad. Why on earth would I even expect things to be the easy? I'm in constant agony and ecstasy. It's painful but its worth it.

To my surprise Starbuck's was pretty busy at 7:30. I ordered a venti cafe latte with soy milk. Sitting towards the back, so I can just loathe myself. I tried to just people watch but my thoughts constantly clouded my mind with Bella. I wonder if it is too early to call Alice. She could help me or at the very least get my mind off of things. Before I could even get my phone out of my pocket, she comes bouncing through the door. That dear sister of mine, doesn't need coffee.

"Edward!" She screeched

"Hi Alice, how are you this morning?"

"Peachy keen belly bean", she replied at inhumanly speed

We sat and talked for about two hours. She had asked about Bella and was very surprised that she wasn't with me this morning. She was sure that the dress should have sealed the deal. Little did she know within seconds I had screwed everything up. She bugged me till I told her everything, admissions so embarrassing I wanted to crawl under a rock and die. I knew I should have stay in bed then I could have avoided being told what an idiot I am, I already knew. I tried to explain myself a bit, Bella wasn't always open about everything, I knew there was still a lot I didn't know about her. She seemed to be on a need to know only basis. Alice told me she felt some of that as well, but she was still dealing with issues from losing her fiance. That Bella was still going to therapy once every two weeks. I was so shocked to know that. I had no idea she was seeing a therapist. I felt a little hurt after that, it stung. If I cried I probably would have. Before my mind had time to process everything Alice had told me, I was being drug out of my seat.

"The shops are opening, come shopping with me?" Alice asked almost shoving me out the door of Starbucks.

"I don't have much of a choice, it seems" I chuckled

This was probably a good way to get my mind off of things and I did owe Alice and she knew it. So I would be shelling out some money on her today. I love my sister dearly though, no matter what I did, she always loved me just the same. I could never do wrong in her eyes. Not that she wouldn't call me out any chance she had to call me a fucking idiot, but she knew my lifestyle before. It never seemed to bother her that her brother was known as an infamous player. She would shrug it off. I probably fucked over half of New York and them some and she still stood by my side no matter what. Being with Bella had seemed to bring us even closer, if that was even possible. She was so glad to see me settling down, but it seemed like every chance I had I was screwing it up though. Alice just wanted to see me happy. My mind still drifted to Bella and her going to therapy when Alice would stop talking for one second. I thought she saw the dentist and doctor a lot, they were just comforting lies. Before my mind could wonder more Alice would snap me out of it. She was good, real good.

We drove out of the city to go to the outlet shops. Alice enjoyed these more because they usually had a lot of one of a kinds, stuff that didn't make it out to the mass productions. As much as I hated shopping, I loved watching her work, it was like nothing I have ever seen. She could circle the ranks and find the best stuff. Even after my mishap with Bella, she was still going to find us both things for Hawaii. She told me not to worry - we were still going. We had to drive an hour or so out, so we took the scenic route. Neither one of us needing to get back anytime soon. It was mostly just trees and a lot of nothing. Houses few and far between. We were driving past a cemetery, looking out the windows quietly before I slammed on the break due to Alice letting out a loud shriek.

"Isn't that Bella's car?"

I knew that car from any other like it, it was defiantly her. I immediately pulled over to the side, basically jumping out. Thinking about nothing else, justseeing her face. Alice stayed in my car. I walked closer till I saw her sitting on the ground by a huge gravestone.

_Robert Banks_

_March 12, 1979 - July 25, 2005_

_It is not length of life, but depth of life.  
He jumped into life and never touched bottom_.

Today was July 25, it was the five year anniversary of his death. My heart broke a little not just because of how I responded but that she didn't tell me. I closed my eyes, trying to swallow. I can't get this taste out of my mouth. She had laid out fresh flowers and I could her talking but not make out exactly what she was saying. I could tell from her raspy voice she had been crying. I wanted to run up and hold her, to comfort her. I just stood here, not knowing what to do, should I leave and call her later or interrupt her. I started walking closer so I could see her better, to get a better idea of her emotions. She was sitting indian style pulling up grass and tossing it aside. I couldn't make out any noise now. Bella was quiet, not saying a word, staring into her lap. From her face it looked like she was at a loss for words, she was obviously have a serious conversation with him. I could see two rings sitting in front of her. Wedding bands, I presume.

"What should I do?", I finally heard her say. I couldn't help but think how intrusive this was, listening in on such a private converation. I needed to leave now or say something.

"Bella", I croaked out, scared of what her reaction was going to be

She turned her head slowly, almost as if she wasn't sure where the voice was coming from. My mouth was so dry, I'm sure it didn't sound like me. When she finally saw me, she just stared as if I a figment of her imagination. She kept rubbing and blinking her eyes. I finally started towards her.

"Bella, I'm so sorry, I didn't know", I shuttered

"Don't be", she sighed, almost on the verge of tears again, "I- I should have told you Edward, I'm so sorry".

I didn't want to press on, she was truly upset and it was a horrible day for her to remember. I sat down next to her wrapping my arm around her tiny waist. She leaned her head on my shoulder and we just sat there in silence. Finally I remembered Alice was in my car and stood up and waved her to go ahead. As I sat back down with Bella I heard the roar from the car's engine and knew she got the hint. I wasn't sure if I should break the silence or just let her be.

"I told him I fell in love on accident, I didn't mean to." "I never expected any of this, it's confusing and I feel guilty, I know he wants me to be happy", she said before burtsing into tears again.

I didn't say anything, I just held her and let her cry it out. I wasn't going to tell her its okay to move on, she needed to know that for herself. I am beginning to understand her better. Everything makes more sense. She hasn't moved on from him, that's why she never dated anyone. We sat there just holding each other for what seemed like forever. I was willing to wait for her. I didn't feel complete without her, I needed her now and I think she needs me.

Finally when her tears dried up she looked at me and smiled, red faced and all. It was almost a goofy grin.

"Thanks for staying with me", she mumbled

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere else", I told her as I kissed her nose

"I'm sorry you had to see me like this", she sighed heavily

I just gave her a tight squeeze, letting her know it was alright.

"I haven't been here for years you know", she sniffed

I cupped her jaw and turned her face towards mine, so she would look me in the eyes.

"Bella, I'm here for you, you can tell me anything", I whispered to her before giving her a soft kiss on her lips.

She stood up, brushing the grass off of her butt, grabbing my hands to help pull me up.

"Your place?" she asked

I just nodded and helped her into the passenger side of her car. I didn't want her driving, she looked so drained. We drove back to my place in complete and total silence. No words, no radio, just the purr from the car's engine. I wasn't really sure what to say, she didn't look sad, just relieved. Or maybe that's what I was hoping for. When we got back to my place finally, I went to lay her down on my bed. I slipped her shoes off and pulled the comforter over her. I kissed her face several times and asked if she needed anything.

"Just you", she replied

"I'll give you everything that I am"

**A/N - okay so I didn't love this chapter, but I had to give in a insight of Bella. Otherwise some stuff later on would not make sense.**


	16. Underneath it all

**A/N- I do not own Twilight Characters**

**Please enjoy and review. Reviews make me happy and I write better that way.**

**Thanks!**

Bella took a four hour nap, she was exhausted from this mornings events. I really wanted to get into that little head of hers, it was really becoming nerve racking. I paced around my living room pretty much the whole time she was napping. I was worried that she wasn't ready to be in a full committed relationship yet. That maybe she needed more time to work out all the shit in her head. I can wait though, I can wait. When finally she woke up, I made beef enchiladas and we ate at our normal spot on the balcony. I poured me a tall glass of Glenlivet and made her a mango martini. I was fighting the inevitable, I had to ask her about him, I had so many questions I felt like my mind was going to explode. It was a bomb building up inside of me. I finally got her to open up a bit about her past. I felt like I needed to know more about this Robert Banks guy. I needed to know, just as much as I wanted to know.

Rob and her met her senior year of high school, he was a junior in college. He taught her what love was. He was her first everything. The first she trusted, the first to love her, kiss her, touch her. When he passed she never thought she would find that kind of love again. That's when the vixen in her finally emerged. She wanted to be touch, loved, but never by the same person. She explained it as almost detaching herslef from reality. She got what she needed, tossed them out. She cried because she said he wouldn't even recognize her now, she has changed so much. Quiet, shy, unsociable were not words I could even believe anyone to describe Bella as. She said she was and didn't know if he would love the person she is now.

I told her he would love her just as much as I do, and probably be glad to see how she had grown. What came next is what really floored me. Bella never got rid of any of his things, she explained further how after he died, she was in such denial, she was sure he was coming back. Nothing of his was touched, everything in the place as he left it. Razor on the bathroom counter, toothbrush by the sink, everything. After she finally started excepting it, she couldn't do it, she didn't want to forget. It was so strange to see her so vulnerable. She stopped talking a bit and downed her drink, maybe hoping inebriation would make things easier. Or help to continue this unyielding conversation.

"I'm afraid if I get rid of it, I will forget him", she sniffled out

I pulled her over to me and just held her tight. I was contemplating what to say to her. I'm letting everything sink in hoping I didn't do damage to our relationship by her reveling all the skeletons in her closet.

She furthered on about her therapy sessions and how she was trying to let go so she could move on with me. My spirits lifted a little from that. That was the little bit of hope I needed from her.

"I left our rings on his grave today, I wanted him to have them".

Step one

**Six Weeks Later**

"Bella our plane leaves in two hours", I yelled at her as she tripled checked that she had everything she needed for Hawaii.

We were finally going on the vacation I won from the silent auction. I was so excited about this. I can't remember the last time I had a vacation. Things between Bella and I have been going smoothly for the last month and a half. I was beyond thrilled to have her all to myself for a week and a half. No appointments, no work, no excuses to have to go home. We have slowly been tackling all the skeletons and becoming closer through it all. I have even attended a few of her therapy sessions, since I was brought up a lot. A few weeks ago her therapist thought getting rid of her car would be a great step on detaching herself from his things. It wasn't a personal item. He had bought it for her right before he died but not directly his. It took several trips to the car dealership and pools and pools of tears, but she finally did it. We got her a 2009 Mercedes Benz G-Class. She is so in love with it, I love seeing her happy about doing it.

Step two

"Bella, we have to go, if you don't have something we will buy it out there, get your cute little ass out here", I shouted again.

The poor little thing comes wheeling three suitcases. I laughed hysterically, she looked like she packed for a year. Hawaii is hot and her clothes couldn't take up much space. Bikinis, short shorts, and tank tops. Seriously how much space does that take up?

"Bella we aren't moving there, love", I teased her

She scolded me, "I never know what I will feel like wearing, so shove it".

I was still laughing which didn't help at all. She put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot waiting for an apology. Little did she know it wasn't coming.

"Ready to go?" I asked her while pulling her in for a kiss.

Hoping she would stop being a brat about a little teasing. Well it was meant to be a sweet kiss and turned into a fierce, tonsil hockey match. We were both really excited about the trip. Maybe a little too excited.

Bella had not flown since Rob's death. I had told her numerous times that is was just as easy to die from a car crash. People fly everyday, we will be fine. Since the flight to Hawaii would take over twelve hours with a non-stop flight, I had planned a little surprise to stop in Las Vegas for a day to break up the flight. I haven't been there in ages and was totally excited to play craps. I haven't told Bella yet, I hope she likes to gamble.

Bella had her nose stuck in some celebrity gossip magazine, so she didn't even pay attention to the gate numbers or anything. She had no idea we were headed to Vegas first. I was bouncing in my seat with excitement, it will actually be a suprise. The flight to Vegas is a little over six hours, so I booked a hotel room at the Venetian so we didn't end up flying all day.

We were starting to get close to Vegas, the pilot announced we would be landing shortly. The look she gave me, you would have thought that we were on the wrong flight. Priceless.

"I thought we could hang out here for a bit to cut up the flight"

She pulled my face in for a huge kiss.

"I always wanted to come here", she announced

I had forgotten that Bella never traveled much. I on the other hand have seen the world. I back packed through Europe after graduating high school. Spent a summer in Spain my freshman year of college. Of course my parents dragged us kids everywhere. The world is so amazing, there is so much beauty to see and I can show that to Bella. When we landed she was so excited about seeing the strip at night. The lights, the people, the casinos. I had a taxi take us to our hotel to get us checked in. We were both starving and wanted to freshen up from the long flight. We arrived at our suite, it was amazing. Two TVs in the living room, one in the bedroom and one in the bathroom. That was any guys dream, taking a shit while you watch TV. Bella opened the curtains to see our view of Vegas from our room. You could see the Mirage and Treasure Island. She squealed with excitement.

"Edward, I can't believe we are here"

That's when she got that look in her eye. I knew that look very well. I saw that look the first time when we were at the Knicks game. I loved that look. It was the vixen taking over her. She quickly closed the curtains, standing there still holding them in her grip. Maybe contemplating her next move. I slowly took a seat on the couch, trying to not make a sound. It was intriguing to watch her. She turned her head giving me a wicked smile. She costivily turned towards me, unbuttoning her blouse. Keeping it closed so she wasn't revealing any skin yet.

I felt my cock hardening from the tease. Finally reaching the last button she swiftly removed her shirt, letting it drop to the ground. I watched it flutter down, to look back up at her in a sexy black lace bra, black shorts, and red stilettos. I am one lucky bastard. I sat there, hoping that my little show I was getting would continue. She walked over to the bar, pouring a glass of Macallan scotch. She took a sip, that little tease. Stirring it with her finger only to suck it off her finger to tease me even more. My cock was growing harder and harder by the minute. She walked over to me handing me the scotch, I downed the whole drink. It was probably the only thing to help me not jiss in my pants. Wanting to feel the warmth from it run all the way down to my stomach. Pulling her bra straps down and giving me a small giggle she ripped her bra off in one smooth notion. Being a totally cock tease by covering her breast with her arms. That's when I lost it, I could no longer take her teasing. I wanted her now.

I wanted to feel her inside of me, to fill her up with my juices. I got up and picked her up bridal style, taking her to the couch. I took her shoes off, while she started unbuttoning my pants. After slipping out of my jeans, I knelt down in front of her. Kissing her beautiful long legs from her ankles to the inside of her thighs. I slowly removed her shorts and black lace panties. Staring at the beautiful masterpiece before me. I leaned up to kiss her lips, taking in her bottom lip to nibble on. While kissing her I started rubbing between her legs, she was already warm and wet for me. I slid one finger inside, making her moan slightly in my mouth. Her moans only making me more aroused, I started pumping my finger in and out, faster and harder. Our kisses deepening while our tongues danced in each others mouths. Pulling me back up I was standing in front of her, she put my dick in her mouth, making me release a growl from the pleasure. Her warm wet mouth taking

every inch of me, like it fucking belonged there. She continued sucking my hard cock, speeding up the tempo, casuing me to through my head back in pleasure. I was so aroused I thought I was about to cum. I pulled out of her mouth and set back on the couch pulling her on op of me. She lowered her wet pussy on my cock, bouncing on my legs. Her tits bouncing in my face, I was in heaven.

"Touchez-moi profond, pur et vrai ", she whispered in my ear

I loathed the French tongue, yet it was like a drug I wanted it and needed it. She knew what it did to me, so she would always do it to me.

"Fuck, Bella", I growled, biting her ear lobe and pulling her closer to me.

Before I could think I was cumming, enjoying the waves of ecstasy flowing through my body. My release must have been a domino effect on her, because I could feel her walls clamping down on me as she came right after me.

After a mid day fucking as Bella would call it we got freshened up and down to the second floor to the Grand Lux for some dinner. It was fucking delicious. We ate fast because we were both eager to hit the casinos. She really wanted to play the slot machines. Though I don't like to waste my time on those since there is no strategy on playing them, it was her first time and I wanted her to enjoy the experience. We ordered a few shots of tequila and then hit the craps tables. I tried my best to explain the game to her. We continued ordering shot after shot, while we played. We were at a hot table and having the time of our lives. When Bella started slurring and swaying I decided it was time to call it a night. We both stumbled back to our suite only to make hot passionate love to each other again, before we passed out for the night.


	17. Are you a member?

**A/N- SM owns Twilight**

**So things are about to get very interesting. Thrill me and send a review/comment/question/request**

**Please enjoy =0)**

Waking up to my love wrapped all up in my arms, freaking amazing. I want this everyday. Last night was, was completely heart-stirring, I think I fell in love with her even more, if that's even possible. I just stared at her, watching her sleep. I needed her to give me everything thing she is, so I can feel complete, I need her to give me more. Hawaii will hopefully bring us even closer to each other. Discover the love we've found.

Glancing over at the clock, I knew we couldn't stay like this all day, as much as I wanted to. Something inside me didn't want to let her go. I slipped out of bed anyway, trying not to wake Bella. We drank a lot last night, so I'm not sure of the condition she will be in. Praying that she isn't hung over, because that will be a horrible flight, I know from experience. I ordered some room service, a plate of fruit, pancakes, bacon, and eggs. We have another six hour flight ahead of us and airplane food is usually horrible. We defiantly needed some food in our stomachs. Help soak up some of that alcohol.

I went to take a shower to help ease the tension in my muscles, and cleanse myself from the stinch of booze and sex. I turned on the shower till it was nice and steamy. I undressed and stepped in. The water was perfect, I stood in front of the shower head, letting it hit my face. I washed my hair and body quickly, hoping that I would get out before our breakfast arrived. I wanted Bella to get all the sleep she needed. I have a lot planned for us in Hawaii.

We are sitting on the airplane waiting for it to take off. Bella was wrapped up in another gossip magazine, so I took out my ipod to listen to some music. After about twenty minutes of us up in the air, Bella excused herself to the bathroom. I hope she was feeling okay. I ordered two cokes, we probably needed to lay off of the alcohol for a bit. I wanted to be able to enjoy some of there fruity cocktails later. Bella seemed to be in the bathroom for awhile. I hope she hadn't gotten sick. Being hung over and the bumpy plane ride may have gotten to her. Maybe I should check up on her. I unbuckled my seat belt and headed for the restroom. I knocked lightly on the door.

"Bella, it's me, are you okay?" I asked sincerely

She cracked opened the door and I slide in, not knowing what to expect. I was praying she hadn't puked everywhere.

Grabbing me fiercely by my shirt she pulled me in for a hard kiss.

"I was wondering how long it would take you", she disclosed

I was dumbfounded by that remark. I wasn't sure what to say. I wasn't expecting this at all. She began kisses me fiercly again, this women was relentless. Unbuttoning my pants and letting my hard cock out, she began stroking it.

"Are you a memeber of the mile high club?"

"No -no", I stuttered, not expecting that, that is where this was headed.

She pulled herself on the sink, sitting there with her little dress hiked up to her waist, all her glory exposed to me.

"Are we really doing this?"

"Fuck, yes", she snapped

Not giving one more thought I shoved my cock into her hot sex. She wrapped her long luscious legs around me as I began pumping in and out of her. I pulled her tighter, kissing her neck and nibbling as I went. This was so fucking hot. No women I knew, was like Bella. Every fantasy I could have, Bella made come true. What ever or who ever she was before, could no way compare to this sexy little vixen seem before me. She was everything I wanted. Smart, sexy, spontaneous as fuck, and she also had a sweet and sensitive side. I kissed my way back up to her mouth, sliding my tongue into her mouth, tasting her. Fucking delicious.

"Harder, harder", she panted

Her words only making me pump in and out of her faster and faster, I could feel my releasing building up inside of me. Just being in here was going to make me cum. I suddenly felt her walls clamp against my cock, sending me into my orgasm. I pumped in and out for few more times, before I fell against her breasts. Both of us panting wildly from the intense rush. That was about the most exciting sex I have ever had. Yet another public place I can check off my list. This was only getting me thinking of how crazy Hawaii is going to be.

We both got dressed and straightened each other up to be make sure we looked presentable when we walked out.

"You leave first, I'm be there in a minute"

I walked out first trying to be all nonchalant. A few people gave me stares.

"She's not feeling well", I spouted out at an older lady that was giving me the stink eye. What a jealous old hag. I really wanted to tell her to fuck off and that yes I did indeed fuck my girlfriend in there.

A few minutes later Bella walked out holding her stomach, to play the part. Sneaking little thing. I laid back in my seat with a stupid grin on my face, chanting wanna be a memeber? Almost laughing out loud, because I never dreamed of actually becoming a member of the mile high club. It was tantalizing. I was probably blowing our cover, glowing like a teenage boy that just had sex for the first time. Bella did these things to me, new emotions and feeling relieved each and every day.

After our little rendezvous, time seemed to fly by. Before we knew it we were landing in Oahu, Hawaii. Bella was bouncing in her seat. It was so cute. We gathered our luggage and headed out to the car retail. I had reserved a mustang convertible. Not what I was used to driving but I wanted a convertible. Bella was excited about it, she said she has always loved mustangs.

We were staying at Outrigger Hotel, with an ocean front room. It was completely breathe-taking, the view was un-fucking-believable. It was worth ever penny spent. Our balcony was looking out at Waikiki Beach. It was so surreal, Bella was in shock.

"I have never seen anything so beautiful" she mouthed

"I have"

She gave me a funny look

"You Bella, the first day I saw you".

I meant it to, it wasn't;t some cheesy line. Every word was true. She is just as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside. We sat on the balcony for hours, just enjoying the perfect Hawaiian weather, the perfect view, and the perfect "us".

She sat in my lap as I brushed through her hair with my hand. This is what heaven is, or at least what it should be. My girl in my lap and the most amazing scenery you can find in the world.

"Hungray?" I asked her, hoping she was because I was freaking starving.

"Sushi would be fabulous", she announced, jumping out of my lap.

"How about we go to a Luau?"

"YES" she screamed.

We checked with the hotel lobby and was taken by them to a Luau.

A huge buffet of food, dancers, and fruit cocktails as far as the eye could see. There were couples everywhere. We grabbed a plate and started piling on food, I wanted to try everything. The menu at the luau was wonderful, basic traditional foods including pua'a kalua (roasted pig) cooked all day in an underground imu which is opened as part of the evening's entertainment.

I told Bella not to look at it, till after she tried it, fearing if she saw the pig

she wouldn't eat it. Other traditional foods include poke (raw seasoned seafood), lomilomi salmon (salmon with tomatoes and onions), chicken lu'au (chicken with spinach, onions and garlic), chicken long rice, sweet potato, haupia (coconut pudding), kulolo (taro pudding) and, of course, poi (made from the pounded root of the taro plant). We both ordered a Mai Tai, and took a seat near the front of the tables lined up. I wanted to be close to the entertainment. I was impressed, I loved everything, especially the pua'a kalua. I was thinking about going for seconds.

While we were eating and the sun was setting, they were teaching people the Hula dance. I made Bella go up there. I was laughing my head off, she was a bright shade of red. She was a natural though, she mimicked the dancers every move. I loved watching her up on stage, swaying her hips, knwoing she was mine. My Bella. I didn't even look around to see if guys were gawking at her. Our eyes never lost contact.

She finally came back and we took a seat around the bonfire. She sat in my lap. The comforting, cool music surrounding us and the gentle breeze was perfect. I could stay here just like this love of my life in arms. Utopia.

"Bella I love you", "More than I could ever explain, move in with me", I whispered in her ear.


	18. Good morning

**A/N - SM owns all things Twilight**

**enjoy, review, have a wonderful day**

"Um -um , Edward I don't know"

"I'm not rushing you Bella, I just wanted you to know how I feel"

"I love you so much, but..... "

"I want you to be sure"

"I'm only sure that I'm not sure"

Those seven little words taunting me, constantly echoing back into my ears. I know we haven't been together forever, but I did want her to live with me. I wanted her toothbrush next to mine, to hold her every night. Surprise her with dinner and warm bathes. Is that selfish of me? I didn't think so. I'm so used to women wanting more and more. It's strange how she is always comfortable where we are. Maybe I just got caught up in the moment. The fresh air must be making me think unclear. I know I'm not drunk from the fruity cocktail drinks, they probably contain no liquor. I'm not going to make her rush into something she's defiantly not ready for. Nor will I sit around and pout about it. I'm in fucking Hawaii for heaven's sake.

I grabbed her tighter, kissing her behind her ear, hoping that she's know its okay. For now. I don't want to ruin our first night here like some kind of jackass. That would be typical for me to fuck this vacation up on the first day. I need to recover and fast. Think Cullen, think. I don't know if it is just me, but the silence feels awkward. My breathing started to pick up, I was panicking. I was bringing this all on myself. FUCK.

"Ready to head back?" I asked, because it was the first thing that popped in my head.

Stupid head, think before you speak.

"Sure, I'm getting sleepy", she replied with a huge yawn.

Not exactly what I was wanting, but better than it being weird between us. Everything seemed to be fine, I guess I was just freaking out for no reason. I had been hoping that being here and how our relationship has furthered she would be ecstatic about living with me. Everything just feels so right. I'm a fool in love, what can I say? I helped Bella up and we headed back towards the car. Holding hands and swinging them like two little kids.

"This evening was magical, don't you think?" she stated with heavy eyes.

"Yes, it was".

I kissed her hand and sat it back into my lap as we drove back to the hotel. Playing our favorite songs as we drove in the cool evening breeze. She sang as we drove along, I watched her from the corner of my eyes, with a huge grin on my face. It's times like these, that you learn to live again and I could only hope she was seeing that. She was definitely different.

I gave her a piggy-back ride to our room, she was so tired she could barely walk. I tossed her on the bed, and told her to pick out a show to watch on TV, while I washed my face. I came back into the room to her braiding her hair and laughing at the TV.

"South Park huh?", I laughed loudly

Only Bella would pick that to watch.

Exhausted from the days events we both passed out as soon as we hit the bed.

"Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey!"

"Huh?" I replied still in a dreamy slumber

"Edward, its time to wake up, we have our shark cage adventure this morning", Bella said while jumping on the bed, "Get UP"!!

Why it always surprises me how much of a morning person she is, is beyond me. Each and every morning with her bouncing around me before I can even keep my eyes open. Definitely one of the many reasons I love her. We scheduled a shark cage adventure for this morning. We had to be there at the butt crack of dawn to get on the boat, but it would with out a doubt be worth being so close to sharks. I was beyond excited and from all the jumping so was she. I am just glad they are still allowed to due this, since people are trying to make it illegal. People think that due to these tourist attractions that sharks follow the boats back to shore. Which lead to more shark attacks. I can't even imagine how cool it will be to swim in waters 600 feet deep and be in there natural environment.

I finally jumped out of bed from the thought of being inches away from a shark. This is going to be fucking awesome.

Before I knew it our little vacation was coming to an end, we were so busy the whole time, time had slipped away from us. I woke up to Bella sitting on the balcony, enjoying the view. Every morning waking up to the ocean view was unbelievable. I wish it didn't have to end, but it was time to get back to reality. We took surfing lessons, went to the sea life park, took a helicopter tour of the island, and even a dinner cruise. We had so many memories to take home with us. Days filled with endless fun and nights of passion.

"Whatcha, thinking about?"

"Your sweet ass", I laughed out,"No I was thinking about all the fun we had here".

"I love making memories with you", she said

We both just stood looking out from the balcony, knowing in just a few hours we would be leaving this all behind. It kind of made me sad. I pulled her into my arms, kissing her neck. Nibbling her and there as I tasted her. She turned around, breaking my lips from her soft delicate skin. She licked her bottom lip, then pulled me in for a deep, long kiss. I matched her back, sucking on her bottom lip. She moaned in my mouth, making my dick twitch. My member was starting to get hard.

We continued kissing, only breaking it as she took my shirt off, tossing it to the side. She started rubbing her hands up and down my bare back, pulling my closer to her. I bucked my hips into her, so she could feel was she was doing to me. She then pulled off her tank top, leaving her in a pink lacy bra and her black cotton shorts. Fucking sexy as hell. It was still really early, and not a lot of people were out, so neither of us seemed to care. If someone was watching, they were in for a good show. I pulled down her bra straps, pressing my face into her cleavage.

Kissing and caressing her breast. I undid her bra, letting in fall to the ground. I continued kissing and sucking on her breasts, small moans escaping her mouth. I trailed kissed down her stomach, pulling her shorts down to her ankles. I kissed her legs all the way up to her heated core, her pink panties were soaked from arousal. I think my eyes rolled to the back of my head as I pulled her panties off, leaving her totally exposed for anyone to see. We were so hot and heavy in the moment, still not caring or checking to see if anyone was watching. I inserted a finger into her hot sex and I began licking in between her folds. She leaned back into the railing, spreading her legs further open for me. Loud groans of pleasure escaping from her lips. Her breathing was picking up, almost into a pant. I inserted another finger, picking up my pace. I continued licking her hot sex as I started rubbing her clit with my free hand.

"Edward, oh-oh edward", she panted, only making me harder.

I could then feel her walls tightening around my fingers, I knew she was getting close to release. She grabbed fists full of my hair, pulling me in closer to her. I inserted a third finger, slamming into her harder and harder.

"FUCK" she screamed

Her walls clamping down on my fingers, I continued pumping in and out of her while she rode out her orgasm.

As soon as she was done, she immediately pulled down my pants and boxers, freeing my hard cock. She licked her lips, then violently shoved me down into the closest chair. She got down on her knees and engulfed the tip of my cock. Circling her tongue round and round, while pumping the shaft with her hand. I wasn't in the mood to be teased. I was freaking horny as hell and wanted nothing more than for her to take my whole length in her mouth. I bucked my hips a couple of times, hoping she would get the hint. I opened my mouth to tell her to stop teasing me but before I could she was taking my entire length in her mouth. I growled from the pleasure. I had my eyes closed as she continued pleasuring me. Cupping and playing with my balls as she sucked me off. I was getting close to cumming, wanting to fuck her right here on our hotel balcony. I pulled her up, leading her back to the railing, her back facing me and all her glory facing out to the ocean. I slowly inserted my cock into her hot, dripping wet sex. I moaned, I loved the feeling of being inside of her.

"Your so wet".

I slowly started pumping my cock in and out of her, loving that I could watch my cock go in and out of her. I grabbed her hips, helping her meet me and slam into her harder and harder.

I kissed behind her ear while whispering sweet nothings to her.

"I love being inside of you Bella"

Her only response was moans, that was good enough for me. I knew I wasn't going to last much longer, so I reached around so I could rub her clit as I fucked her.

"I want you to cum on my hard cock"

The touch to her sensitive skin, sent her over the edge, her breathing was frantic. Her moans becoming louder and louder as I rubbed her clit. I gave it a quick pinch and then we instantly came together. I couldn't think of a better way to end our vacation.


	19. Happy Holiday's

**A/N - I own nothing Twilight**

**Thanks to all of those who reviewed the last two chapters! Love you guys! That's what motivates me to get these chapters out faster.**

Life is moving along nicely as planned. I still haven't gotten Bella to say yes about moving in with me, but I have a plan. Sooner than later she will say yes. I can feel it. The walls she had built up are slowly but surely crumbling down. I am being very patient, but still keeping my ground. I wasn't pushing the subject but when the time felt right, I would her ask again. I have asked her two other times since Hawaii. The same answer was given, she wasn't sure. I never had the balls to ask her why, because I didn't want to start a fight. I know I'm being a total chicken sit. It's just that I'm a little afraid of what her answer will be. It seemed simpler this way, for both of us. Bella has been coming along well though, just the other day she cleaned out all her ex-fiances stuff from the bathroom. She tossed it out without hesitating. That sight was fucking glorious.

Step three

Bella has been out sick the last couple of days with a cold. I have been overwhelmed with work and with the Holiday's approaching, so I haven't been able to see her. I was thrilled to death when I called her this morning and she was feeling better. I have been dying to see her. Tonight is Alice's annual Halloween party and I was hoping she was still going. We are going as Sally and Jack Skellington from the Nightmare before Christmas. We decided on them since we both love the movie and in hopes no one else would think of it. I hate going to these parties and there are several people wearing the same costume. You would think as anal as Alice is, you would have to get your costume approved.

I showered and shaved, glad I was wearing a mask so I didn't have to even attempt to manage my unruly hair. I got ready early, I couldn't wait to pick my Bella up. I missed her so much. I don't think I could jump into my car fast enough. I ignored all speed limits and driving laws, screw that no u-turn sign. I just wanted to hold her, I missed her warmth. I hated that she wouldn't let me take care of her while she was sick. She kept insisting for me to focus on work, that she just needed rest. That having me over wouldn't help her get any sleep. When I reached Bella's place, she had the door open before I could even knock. She must have been just as anxious to see me.

"I missed you"!

"I missed you way more", I told her while picking her up for a huge bear hug.

I spun her around, I was just so happy to see her. The days felt like weeks. You would have thought she had been out of town or something. I finally put her down so I could get a look at her. She was a fabulous Sally. She left her hair, long and straight. She wore red lip stick and had drawn on black stitches on her face neck and arms. We would definitely win best couple.

The party was pumping. Loud music, liquor as far as the eye could see and delicious hors d'oeuvres. Alice really knows how to throw a kicking party. All of our friends were here, even a few I wished weren't. Unfortunatley with my past, I was bond to run into a few pissed off ex girlfriends. Tanya for one. Even with my mask on she knew it was me, it was creepy really. She glared at me, for what seemed like forever.

I was just praying she would stay in her little corner and let me be.

Of course I knew better than that. Dressed up as Barbie without her Ken doll, she walked over towards us. Bella was feeling the tension between Tanya and I. You could cut it with a knife.

We were sitting around taking cabo wabo shots with Alice and her newest boy toy, Jasper, having a great time. Trying to ignore the fact that two blue eyes have been glaring at my back all night. Laughing and discussing the outrageous costumes here tonight.

When all of the sudden I feel someone playing with hair, since I got rid of my mask about thirty minutes of being at the party. I look over to Bella to see her brow furrow. Alice must have caught it because she asked Bella to come to the kitchen with her. I don't know that leaving me by myself with Tanya was the best option. I would have rather just let Bella punch her.

"So this is who you left me for?" Tanya whispered in my ear

I didn't answer her, I didn't feel the need to give her any explanation, I fucked her a couple of times before I started seeing Bella. Get over it. She's easy and I knew that, is it a crime to want to get laid? We have known each other forever, she has been friends with Alice since high school, so I knew it was a sure deal. She had been trying to hook up with for years. I should have known better but she just happened to be at the same bar as me and I was lazy that night. I wanted some booty and didn't feel like working for it. That's the story, the end.

"I can give you the best sex of your life", she whispered in my ear, then licking it.

Of course my luck, that's when Bella walked back into the room. I could see Bella's breathing picking up. She walked over, poured herself two shots, slammed both of them back and walked out of the room. I swear as soon as I get comfortable, the universe likes to fuck up my perfect little world. Constantly my past creeps back up and gives me a swift kick in the ass. Karma. Fucking karma.

How I loathe thee.

I looked around everywhere for Bella. I finally found her outside talking to a group of guys. I gave her the, I really need to talk to you now look. She ignored me. Fuck. Where I happen to find all of these persistent bitches, I don't know.

When I finally saw Bella heading to the bathroom, I decided to follow her. I checked the knob, it was locked. Luckily though the bathroom has two doors, so I checked the one from Alice's bedroom. Score. I peeked in, before barging in, in case she was using the restroom. She was looking in the mirror, like she was having some sort of internal battle with herself. I opened the door, making her jump.

"Bella, please don't be upset over Tanya", I pleaded

She didn't say anything. I walked over to her, pinning her up against the bathroom door. I wasn't going to let her leave until she talked to me. This was stupid.

"Please Bella, I'm not going to lie", I disclosed, "I had sex with her on several occasions, before we started seeing each other". "I haven't had sex with anyone since you". "Please don't let that skanky bitch ruin our evening."

Still nothing, she just glared out me, like that wasn't good enough. I can't fucking change my past, what's done is done and I'm not going to regret it. I leaned in to kiss her neck, brushing her hair to one side.

"I love you Bella, I have never loved anyone else".

I continued kissing up her neck, to her jaw line, finally reaching her lips. I gave her a chaste kiss on the lips.

"I want you and only you"

I kissed her lips, licking her bottom lip, begging for her to kiss me back. I grabbed her right breast, caressing it, trying to get any emotion out of her. I kissed her lips again.

"Love me".

I kissed her lips again and gazed into her deep brown chocolate eyes. I wanted to see if I could read them. There was not hurt or sorrow in those eyes. Just glazed over frombeing drunk.

"Take me home", she pleaded.

We headed back to her place. I can't believe Tanya had ruined are fucking evening. The ride home was silent. My mind was racing over what to do, to say. I wasn't sure how to make this better. We all have pasts, she pretty much knew mine, or at least I thought. I've changed, she knows that. Or does she? Is that why she's so hesitate toward progressing our relationship. When we finally got to her place, I walked her to the door. I kissed her forehead, waiting for her to say or do something. The silence was fucking killing me.

"Will you come in?"

Before I could even answer she grabbed my arm and was leading my into her bedroom. I was shocked,I had never been in here before. It was simple and elegant. Deep black merlot finish furniture, against light blues walls. Her bed was inviting with a silver duvet and cream colored pillows. I immediately saw the picture she had of us on her bedside table.

"I over reacted, I'm sorry", she uttered as she pulled me in for a sweet tender kiss.

I sat on her bed as we continued kissing. She was undressing herself not breaking our kiss. She shoved me down, so I was laying on my back. Taking off my pants,while I took off my shirt. I reached my arm around her neck pulling her back to kiss her. We were both crazed with love and lust as our mouths and hands explored every single inch of each others bodies. Instead of rushing into sex like we normally did. We played and fondled every body part, learning every reaction from ones touch.

Before I knew it Thanksgiving was here and gone and Christmas was just two weeks away. I'm taking off work until the second week of January to relax and enjoy the holidays. I have worked hard all year long, so that's my Christmas present to myself. I'm putting up the Chritmas tree while Bella is wrapping gifts.

"What do you think?"

"The ornaments look pretty, but there pulling down the branches of the tree."

I sneered at her, because she had told me to get a bigger tree in the first place.

"It's looks fine, I'm kidding," she laughed aloud.

"When are you going to tell me what you want for Christmas?" "There are only thirteen shopping days left".

"Bella I have told you, I only want is for you to move in". "That would make me the happiest man alive".

She furrowed her brow. This only meant that I would have to break down and actually think of something. My stubbornness wasn't working on her.

"Fine", she said as she leaned in for a kiss.

"Fine what?"

"Your getting the only thing you want for Christmas".

I gave her a huge smile, because I think she was saying what I wanted her to say.

"I'll move in with you".


	20. Home Now

**A/N - own nothing Twilight**

**Please enjoy and review -- Thanks!**

I can't believe she's said yes, she's going to move in with me. This Christmas is going to be amazing. I was so happy I was about to stand up and do a happy dance. Maybe I should, that might turn her on.

"So merry fucking Christmas Edward, but I'm still getting you something".

"When do you want me to come over to help you move"?

"Edward, I just agreed like thirty seconds ago".

"I know but I can't wait, I want you here now."

She gave me a wicked smile. I loved that smile, it almost always lead me to interesting things. That smile fulfilled many fantasies. I loved that little vixen of mine. She crawled over to me like a sexy cat on the prowl. Foxy, fucking foxy. She gave me a chaste kiss. I pulled her into my lap. Kissing her madly. Getting all hot and bothered I started stripping every single bit of clothing off of our bodies. Before I could make another move, Bella was straddling me, mounting herself on top of my huge erection. She inserted herself slowly. It felt so good, I let out a loud moan.

"Do you like me being inside me?"

"I love it baby, your so wet."

I couldn't control myself, moan after moan kept escaping from my lips.

"You make me so wet."

I loved it when she talked dirty to me, it just riled me up more. I grabbed her hips, helping her bounce on top of my cock. I was pounding her harder and harder, making her moan along with me.

"Mmm ... Edward."

I flipped her over so she was on all fours. Slamming my cock back inside of her, where it wanted to be. I slapped her tight ass several times as I maneuvered in and out of her. I quickened my pace, wanting her to have several orgasms before I cum. I started rubbing her clit, while still thrusting myself into her sweet love hole. Bella was so wet, I wanted to lick up every single drop of her juices. Her walls were clamping down on my cock, I knew she was about to cum. I started rubbing her clit harder and faster.

"Yeesssss", she screamed.

Unfortunately her screams of pleasure sent me into my own I finished releasing all my juices inside of her, we both took a minute to catch our breath. She crawled into my lap, placing sweet kisses all over my face, while humming some song.

"Ready for round two?" she asked while nibbling my ear.

I could never get enough of her.

I was meeting Alice today for lunch and some shopping. I needed to get Bella something for Christmas and knew Alice would help me pick out something fucking amazing. Alice's impeccable taste would surely be useful in finding the perfect gift. I told her Bella already gave me my present, she was so excited. You would have thought I told her we were getting married or Bella was pregnant, from the way she was jumping around.

"I can't believe it Edward, forget, lunch lets shop!"

I wasn't the least bit surprised to hear that from my sister. She would buy a pair of shoes, instead of getting groceries. Shopping was a priority for her.

"So big brother, Tiffany's first?"

I nodded in agreement. I wanted to get Bella something beautiful. Something she could wear and it would remind her of me.

We looked around the store for hours. I think Alice tried on almost every piece of jewelry, but it helped me to know what to get her. I was definitely in debt to Alice for everything she's done. She's the best sister ever. She deserved an extra special gift. I had it narrowed down to two items, so I thought what the hell, I'll take both and get Alice the atlas diamond bangle bracelet she had been drooling over earlier. My mission was now complete. Christmas shopping done!

"Edward all this shopping has me starved"

Of course now she wants me to buy her lunch.

I was having my company's Christmas party at my place this year, on Christmas Eve. I needed to get some alcohol and food since it was only days away. I was hoping I would have Bella moved in by then, but she has been really sick with a stomach virus. She went to the doctor today to hopefully get some medicine. The last couple of days she was suppose to be cleaning and packing up her things. I was going over there tonight to help her bring them over. For now she was just bringing clothes and personal items, since my place is fully furnished.

I wanted her to have some thing of hers, so it felt like her home as well, but the majority of her furniture was going to storage. In plans that one day we will buy a house and need more furniture. After racking up a bill of over fifteen hundred dollars in booze, I headed straight over to Bella's. I picked up some chicken noodle soup and crackers, to get something in her stomach since she hadn't kept anything down in a couple of days.

When I reached Bella's place and knocked on the door, I found my sweet Bella in her pink robe, fuzzy slippers and empty boxes on the floor. She hadn't packed a thing.

"Bella, how are you feeling?"

"I was sleepy, so I haven't gotten much done."

I could obviously see that. Nothing was done. She went back to the couch and laided down in fetal position. She looked horrible, I couldn't be mad at her. My poor baby was ill.

"The movers are coming over tomorrow to move your furniture to storage, do you need me to be here?"

"No it's fine", she mumbled, "There not taking my chair".

"The red one?"

"Yes, I want to bring it, we can put it in the bedroom, next to my side".

"Love, we can figure that out later".

"NO!" "I'm bringing the chair!" she demanded

"What the fuck is up with the damn chair?"

She didn't say anything, but the look she gave me told me everything I needed to know. That was his chair. Holy shit, really, she was going to do this to me. We have come this far and now she wants to have "his" fucking chair in my bedroom. I was fucking livid. I have been patient and understanding. How dare she think that, that is okay. Are we suppose to be one fucking big happy family. Fuck that.

I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to get a grip on myself.

"It's his, isn't it?"

No answer.

"You want to bring his shit to my place?" Is this what you are fucking telling me?"

After the words spilled from my mouth, like fucking word vomit. I instantly regretted them. Asshole, I am a complete asshole.

"Get."

"The."

"Fuck."

"Out."

"Bella, I'm sorry".

She jumped up off the couch, shoving me out the door.

"Get out". "Get the fuck out Edward".

What have I just done?

It's Christmas Eve, the day of the company Christmas party. I still haven't talked to Bella. I got a text yesterday, that said she was still sick. That wasn't good enough, she could have called to talk to me. I left message after message trying to explain myself. Drove over to her place on several occasions and she wouldn't open the door. I sent flowers, to apologize. I was going insane. I know I over reacted and should have been more understanding, but one fucking text is all I get. I think she forgets what an asshole I can be sometimes.

I'm trying to set up for the party, but I can't stop thinking about her and what I should have said. Every time I come up with something better to say, I call her and leave a message. Around eight, people started showing up. I had been drinking since noon, so I was already sporting a good buzz. I tried to be an entertaining host, but I couldn't be myself. I tried to fake it, but I couldn't keep the charade going. I decided to grab the bottle of Glenlivet and just hang out with me, Bella could be the vacant chair.

A fight over furniture, it just didn't seem fair. I just wanted her here now, hold me and make it all better. I didn't want another Christmas by myself. It's how it always ended up. I continued neglecting everyone around. Several people tried to get me to come enjoy the party, but I just couldn't. I was constantly checking my phone. No texts or calls, so I checked to make sure it was working properly. The more alcohol I consumed the more I was becoming obsessed with my phone. I was getting paranoid of it not functioning correctly, that I might miss her call. To hopefully subside my paranoia, I called Bella again. Of course it went straight to voice mail, would I expect anything less.

"Bella, I love you and miss you". "Please come to the party, I need to see you".

I called again.

"Bella, we need to talk in person, it can't be sincere unless your here with me." "Please, I love you and its Christmas Eve."

The loud music and conversations filled the balcony and living room. I was else where, I couldn't even tell you what song was playing. Probably some cliche Christmas song like Jingle Bell Rock. I can't stop looking over at our Christmas tree, staring at the two little blue boxes with white bows. I started imagining her face when she opened them. How I longed to see her smile. Could she really be so mad, that she would want me to spend Christmas alone. I hope not.

Drowning my sorrows with a bottle of scotch, I caught Tanya walking over towards me from the corner of my eye. Fuck, when will this bitch get a fucking clue?

"Hello Edward," Tanya my ex said hugging me from behind.

"Go away, just leave me alone," I scolded.

"Come out here, everyone wants to see you."

"I'm fine right here".

"Edward, this is your party, come dance with me," Tanya pleaded

"No, I shouted"

There was no way in hell she was getting my drunk ass up off this chair, to dance with her stupid ass. I don't even know why the hell she is here, I didn't fucking invite her.

"Eddie don't do me that way", she said pulling me in for a kiss while holding mistletoe over my head.

What the fuck, is she really trying to kiss me? I don't think I could ever be drunk enough to touch her again. At this point in time I was pretty obliverated and still didn't want her. I just wanted Bella.

When I finally get her off of me, I slowly looked up and to my surprise was Bella. She was holding a thin rectangular box wrapped in silver paper with a bright red bow. She looked so beautiful in a red silk dress and zebra stripped stilettos. I could feel a smile forming on my face. I was so happy she decided to come. Then life seemed like it was playing in slow motion, tears start pouring over Bella's eyes. Makeup starting to smear down her perfect face. My smile immediately faded. I heard glass shatter and before I could react she ran out the door. I was way too drunk to run after her. I couldn't even get out of the chair, much less go after her. I kept yelling for her, but I knew she would be gone. I called her phone non-stop, leaving message after message. After an hour of my constant calling she finally blocked my number. I gave up and passed out.

The next morning I woke up in the chair, with a headache from hell. My place is trashed. Food, liquor bottles, beer bottles everywhere. Appreciative employees huh? I was a horrible excuse for a human being. I drank almost a whole bottle of Glenlivet, while I sat around feeling sorry for myself. I don't even remember most of the night. Glad my employees at least decided to leave at some point. Then I look down and saw a present on the floor. Oh shit, it was coming back to me..... Bella saw Tanya kissing me. I tried calling Bella again. Shit, she still had my number blocked. I walked over and sat on the floor. I read the card first.

_To Edward the love of my life. _

_Here's to our first Christmas together and to many many more._

_I love you more than life its self _

_-- Bella_

I unwrapped the present, it was a sterling silver picture frame from Tiffany's. What was the real present was the picture that laid inside. A sonogram picture. Bella is seven and a half weeks pregnant with our child. I felt tears forming up in my eyes. I was mixed with too many emotions. More than anything I wanted Bella home now. I need her to talk to me. I curled up into a ball holding the picture close to my heart. I was hoping Bella would give me a chance to explain. I know now what I need to do.


	21. Too Late

**A/N - own nothing Twilight**

**Please review and of course enjoy**

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve and I finally got Bella to meet me at Blue Moon cafe for some lunch. It took lots of phone calls and messages from other peoples phones for her to agree, but she did. She chose a restaurant I'm guessing, so no one can make a scene. We needed to talk though. I didn't give a shit where it was, as long as we talked. We can't go on like this. I have been in complete melancholy since she walked out that door. She never even gave me a chance to explain. It's like we always get so far and then it just starts rewinding, the same old song we're playing it again. Always something getting in the way, well my past to be exact. Compulsion has stained me.

My ruthless, womanizing ways will haunt me for the rest of my life. Or maybe just until my looks fade away. Even thousands of miles away, it still lingers there. I guess it is inevitable, I walk alone. The one women I love, need, crave, fulfills my every desire is plagued with my wretched past. I wish I could go back and rewrite my past, but I can't. I thought she knew me, that she knew I wasn't that person anymore. I wanted her, I love her completely and will do whatever it takes. We can move across the world. To Paris or London where I'm not known. My only real chance is- is the baby. The only thing that ties us together. Can it be enough though? I desperately want it to. The days alone I have spent in my apartment staring at this tiny little person in a picture, nothing made me happier. She had to have been happy about it too, the picture was my Christmas present. The best gift on earth.

Usually I would drown my sorrows in my liquor of choice, till I just no longer had feelings. Not anymore, this baby changed me. I cleaned my whole place. I emptied one of my rooms, for the baby. I wanted Bella to know I was serious about this. The day after Christmas I went back to Tiffany's for an engagement ring. I wanted her to know I was truly committed. I wanted this. To become a happy little family. Never before would this have even cross my mind, that's true. It was different now. I want to make Bella my wife. I want to give her everything she wants and needs. To raise this beautiful child together and fuck, have a couple of more.

I waited for Bella to arrive at the cafe, for what seemed like forever. I drank some coffee and finally after waiting for over thirty minutes I ordered an egg salad sandwich. I munched on my sandwich and chips, hoping that she didn't stand me up. I think I deserve a little something. I feel like she caught me fucking Tanya. I know her pregnant mind probably took it way out of proportion. The suspense is fucking killing me. I have been sitting here for forty-five minutes waiting on her. I pulled out the ring, staring at it hoping it will give me some motivation or maybe a little confidence. I sure as hell needed some about now. The ring was white gold vintage band with a two karate diamond. I had éternellement vôtre in-scripted on the inside. Hopefully she would love it and except it.

Finally she showed up, she was over an hour late. She sat down and looked down to staring at the table. I guess this was truly hard for her, my heart sunk a little. This defiantly wasn't going in the direction I was hoping. She never said anything about being late, we just sat in awkward silence. I was just taking her in, I missed her so much. I wanted to kiss her, but I could tell that was wrong.

"Bella, I- I'm so sorry you walked in on that." "She just started kissing me, please know that I was trying to get her off of me." "I love you so much and I'm so excited about the baby". "I cleared out one of the guest rooms for the nursery".

She looked up at me biting her bottom lip. The look in her eyes and on her face were making me extremely nervous.

"Edward...... we- we..... I can't do this."

"Do what love?"

"Us".

I grabbed her hands into mine. I wasn't going to let her go again.

"I don't understand Bella, I didn't kiss her, this doesn't make any sense".

"Edward, I love you, I truly do". "I can't go around pretending anymore, every women looking at you everywhere we go". "All I can see is you fucking them".

"I can't change my past, you knew, before all of this." "Bella why now?" "This isn't fair, you can't ..... you can't."

"Edward, I'm leaving, I need time away." "I already talked to Jessica and she is coming back to take my place." "I'm sorry."

I grabbed hold of her tighter, she wasn't walking out that door. Not like this.

"I want to be part of our baby's life, please don't leave me, don't leave me Bella".

"Don't make this any harder than it already is".

She can't fucking leave me, this isn't fair. This is our baby. How can she just get up and leave? I was panicking, I didn't know what to do. I had to make this better and fast. The only thing I could think of, I just did it. Even though I didn't plan it this way, but nothing with us ever came as planned.

"Bella please....". I got down on one knee and pulled out the ring, "Bella I love you more than life its self, marry me".

I slipped the ring on her ring, before she said a word. I wanted her to feel in on her finger, to know that is felt right. This is what we wanted.

"Bella, please be my wife, I want to spend the rest of my life with you".

"Edward, I - I ........ It's too late".

"But I don't want to the love we have to end".

She walked right out of my life, not even looking back.

I now know what heart break feels like, mine was just shattered.

**A/N- the inscription is eternally yours**

**don't forget to review!!!**


	22. Rock Steady

**A/N - I own nothing, just there little adventures.**

**Please enjoy and review!! Thanks =0)**

What have I done?

What should I do?

How could all of this just fade away?

A true love survives,doesn't it?

I feel like I could just lay down and die. Question upon question forming in my head, making it spin. Tanya kissing me, Bella's pregnant and now she's leaving. The violent timing explains this ugly aftermath. Never did I even begin to think it would lead me here. In shambles and broken hearted, not just broken but incinerated. There now lies just a black hole where my heart should be. The women of my dreams gone, just walked right out of my life. No exact reasoning behind it all. I can understand being angry or wanting revenge. Just getting up and leaving, now that caught me by total surprise. Quite the sucker punch to the face, if you ask me.

At this point I see that there are two feasible options. The first, sulk in my misery and become a bitter, old, lonely, drunk man. Two, run after her and I better run pretty fucking fast too. The sands of time continue to fall and I can't turn the hourglass over, every second she gets further away. A butterfly once cupped in my hands, but now gone from my clutch. Only leaving colorful dust behind to remind me of the special times we had.

I walked out of the cafe, feeling like a total loser. I ask the one person in the whole world to marry me and she said no. I didn't even bother to look and see if anyone was watching or listening. That would just make things even worse for me. I got in my car, thinking if I had any other options. How about I rub a fucking lamp or get a re-do. Fuck me.

Sitting here in my car in the cafe parking lot doesn't seem like a viable option at this point in time. Unless I want option one, which seems like where I'm headed. I'm in so much pain, I can't even fucking function properly. I need a game plan, a good one at that. I don't have time to get Alice, so I'm on my own this time. I have to make her stay, I have too. At the very least get more information out of her. Where is she going and why? I also needed to tell her I would do anything, anything to make this work. She is my life and I can't live without her.

Instead of just sitting here like a jackass, I finally put my car in drive. I drove like a bat out of hell to Bella's apartment, ignoring every stop light, stop sign and speed limit. I was weaving in and out of every car in sight. Reaching speeds of over a hundred, praying there were no cops around. I probably looked like Cruella De Ville from Disney. I knew time wasn't on my side. Nothing was. The universe was once again playing cruel jokes on me. Pointing its ugly finger and laughing in my face.

I reached her apartment, the door was open, the place empty. From the shock I ran to every room, hoping to find her. Nothing. Nothing left. I don't know where to even begin looking for her. Her parents live somewhere in Texas, other than that I know nothing. I fell to the floor, defeat succumbing over my whole body. It was gettingharder for me to breathe. My lungs givingup, I was suffocating.

How could she just get up and leave? This couldn't be better, not for either of us. No closure, too many unanswered questions. We go from happy, to nothing in a matter of days. The only place I can think of is work. Possibly she is clearing her office out.

I finally reached our floor at the office building. Panting from running around like a total manic. The elevator doors couldn't open fast enough, I was trying to pry them open myself. I ran straight to her office. Boxes of her stuff on the desk. She had been here and hopefully still is. I sat down in her chair trying to catch my breath, then I heard her talking. It sounded like she must be on the phone.

"I'm feeling fine Dad, please don't worry about me", she said

I good tell from her voice she had been crying. She sounded so sad. I wanted to run over to her and pick her up. Stash her away under my pillow, only taking her out for my own pleasure.

"I can't talk right now, I love you, talk to you soon"

I was hoping the soon was as in I'll call you later, not that that is where she was going. She can't be 1500 miles away from me. She can't. I waited in her chair, hoping she was coming back in soon.

I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

She never returned. I was starting to think I was hearing her voice in my head, that it hadn't happened. Bella had to become coming back though, her stuff was still here. I started looking through her stuff. I usually didn't pry into peoples business, but I was hoping somewhere inside of one of these boxes lies an answer for me. On top was a couple of pictures. One of Bella and I, the other of me sitting on me sitting on my balcony. She had a few books and lots of pens, markers, and girly note pads. Nothing helpful except a card from the doctor, she had an appointment in two weeks. I wrote all the information down, hopefully she was still planning on going. It felt kind of stalker-like but I had to do what I had to do. Instead of waiting here all day, I wrote her a letter.....

_Bella my love,_

_It seems as though I have one and only last chance to tell you how I feel. You are my world, my love, my every waking breathe._

_ You have fulfilled my every fantasy, my loneliness, the void in my heart. I completely understand if you don't want to deal with _

_the skeletons in my closet. I do assure you that closet is closed. I __will move across the world to be with you. I love you more than_

_ life itself. I do hope now matter what you choose you will let me be about in our childs life. It's not too late for us Bella, we can work _

_whatever it is out. Our love is strong._

_I love you always and forever_

_Edward_

and stuck in the ring inside. I walked over to my office, sulked down into my chair. I could just wait her until she returned for her things. I waited for what seemed like days, the sky was now dark. My eyes lids were getting heavy.

I must have dosed off. I woke up and it was still dark outside. I heard the elevator door ding. I looked at my watch, it was after one in the morning. I missed the New Year's party at Alice's. I didn't care though. I would have been sad and miserable anyhow. I was still groggy from falling asleep, I walked out of my office. There she was sitting in her chair, reading my letter. I must have startled her when I stood in the door way. She dropped the letter onto the floor. I noticed she had the ring on. That had to be a good sign, right?

"Bella, can we talk please?"

"Have you been here all night, I went to Alice's to find you, I thought you would be there."

"I was waiting for you, we need to talk about this".

"I know, I'm sorry ...... it's just hard .... I'm so confused."

"About what Bella, you can't leave me." "I won't let you".

I grabbed her hands into mine, I felt that warm tingling sensation through my whole body. My body has never reacted to someone like this ever. I know we are meant to be together. She's my missing puzzle piece, I need her to be complete.

"Bella, I can't live without you, I need you and I know you need me."

I cupped her face with my hand, kissing her a gentle kiss on the lips. I missed them so much. She kissed me back, I could feel that hole in my chest repairing itself with that simple gesture. I pulled her in closer, deepening the kiss, grazing my tongue over her bottom lip. We can make this right.

I closed my eyes so tight, trying to force the thoughts out of my head. I wanted to just let us happen. We tilted our heads in opposite directions as we opened our mouths wider. Gently ginving each other soft, open mouth kisses. I heard a slight mmm escape from her lips as we continued our motions. I pulled away, trying not to get too carried away. First and foremost we needed to talk. I pulled her hands up to my mouth, kissing the ring.

"Your wearing the ring".

"I know, it's beautiful Edward".

"Not as beautiful as you".

I rubbed circles with my thumbs on her belly.

"Happy New Years Edward".


	23. Crash into me

_**A/N - I own nothing twilight**_

**_Sorry about the delay, I have been busy and football started_**

**_Anyhow please enjoy and review if you like!_**

_Beep ...... beep ..... beep_

That's all I heard, that fucking annoying beeping sound. I keep drifting in and out of sleep to the sound. I wish someone would cut that shit out. My head is pounding and that beeping sound isn't helping one freaking bit. It was a familiar sound, but I just couldn't quite put my finger on it. I've heard it before, I know that much. It was undeniably getting on my last fucking nerve though. I was feeling sore and lying in the most uncomfortable bed ever. Where am I and why won't that annoying beep fucking go away. I am defiantly not at home in my last thing I remember was Bella at my office and kissing those amazing lips of hers. Our reunion. Her finally coming to her freaking senses and realizing that the love we share is rare and to never let it go. You only see a love like ours once every blue moon. Something that never should be taken for granted.

_Beep ..... beep ....beep_

I'm getting really irritated now and if I could move without the fear of this pain getting worse, I would find whatever is making this annoying sound and kill it. Where the fuck am I? Why am I so tired and sore. Every square inch of my body is sore. I feel like I was hit by a bus, a really big bus. Just open your eyes Cullen and all will be answered. Yes, really its that easy. You only have to open one eyelid. I finally maned up and open my eyes. I had to blink a couple of times for them to adjust the light. It was really bright, white walls everywhere. I am really confused. I look to my left and see all this medical equipment.

_Beep .... beep .... beep_

That's where that sound is coming from, a heart monitor. What? Wait. A what? Am I in a ......

"Edward!!..... Edward!!! Your okay, thank god", Bella shouted kissing me all over my face.

"Bella, that's going on?"

"Your were in a car accident, you got pretty banged up, do you remember anything?"

"Just you at the office, nothing after that."

"What? I was never at the office Edward."

It was a dream? None of that happened. Memories of my dream flashed back through my head. The phone call I over heard her having with her Dad, her saying Happy New Years. The kiss that mended my heart back together. It was all a dream. I don't feel broken inside anymore, just on the outside. What the hell did I do?

"What? When? Fuck Bella give me some answers."

"About an hour after I left the cafe, I got a call from Alice that you were in a car accident. I'm so glad you okay though." she said still continuing to kiss all over my face between words.

"Is everyone okay?"

"Yes, you hit a telephone poll, no other car was involved. I'm just so glad you okay. Why were you driving so fast, you could have killed yourself."

"I couldn't let you go Bella, your my life."

She started kissing me all over my face again. I was so confused, I'm not sure what happened and what was really just a dream. Obviously the cafe happened, but after that? Did I go to her apartment? I knew for sure most the office stuff was in fact a figment of my imagination. I looked into her chocolate brown eyes. They looked much different from when we talked at the cafe. I could see the love and relief in them. A major difference from the blank stare from the cafe. She grabbed my hands and I noticed she had the ring on.

"Edward, I was so scared. I'm so so so sorry. About everything."

Everything, everything? Did that mean she wasn't leaving? Or did I dream that up too. I'm still unaware of the days events. Nothing was making sense. She had the ring on, how in the hell did she get it back if she never went to the office. The letter, it was in the letter. What was there a letter? It must have still been in my pocket, or did she never give it back? Hell if I know.

"Edward, are you okay? Your looking at me funny."

"I'm just glad your here with my Bella, please don't leave me."

"I will never ever ever leave you."

She gave me a kiss so sweet it made my toes curl. I think that was the only thing on my body that didn't ache.

"Mr. Cullen glad to see your finally awake. You had quite a nasty spill, how are you feeling?" a doctor asked me.

"Very sore."

"Well that's to be expected, you will probably be very sore for awhile. You have three broken ribs, other than that just bumps and bruises. You were very lucky Mr. Cullen."

"My baby, my baby", my mom shouted running up to me, practically shoving the doctor out of her way, "Edward Cullen you never scare me like that again."

I love how only a mother can go from being worried in tears, to about to smack the top of your head for being an idiot, in a blink of an eye. I was pretty drowsy from the pain meds. I guess that's why reality hasn't quite set in on me yet. I was totally okay with it for the time being, maybe that's the Demerol talking. The only thing I'm sure of is my Bella is here with me now. That's what I was after in the first place. Whether or not this was how I wanted it to come about, didn't matter. She's here and never leaving. Mission accomplished.

Fuck. Fuck me, what about my car? My precious car. Damn why to I have to be so stupid. My pride and joy ..... wrecked.

"Bella? How is she?"

She gave me the look. I knew she was a goner. My precious baby, destroyed fro my stupidity. My mom walked over and kissed my forehead.

"Honey, I have to go, I will call and check on you tonight. I'm so glad your okay. Love you."

"Love you mom."

She whispered something into Bella's ear while hugging her and walked out the door. I was not proud to being here in this state for my mom to see. A mother should never have to seen this. I wasn't sure how I looked, but from every ones faces, I knew it wasn't too good.

It was getting really hard for me to keep my eyes open. I was so drowsy. Bella pulled a chair up to the hospital bed and laid her head next to my stomach.

"Bella ..... I love you."

"I love you too."

"Don't ever leave me, I need you."


End file.
